Friday, May 29, 2009

Right Hand, Meet Left Hand

Letters, we get letters:
  • SCC, you are going to loooooove this one.

    (XXX) District gets a letter today from Patrol Division wanting to know about a drop off in index numbers. They have a couple of days to respond. The numbers weren't down. They just weren't entered because the Officer who does stats was out of town.

    But the Officer comes back Thursday and guess what? Their spot has been eliminated! They're back out on the street and who knows when the stats will be entered now? If they were the vengeful type, they'd toss the whole pile of numbers in the garbage.
This is the second time we've heard of this and it points out a serious flaw in the ongoing reorganization. There are people downtown whose sole purpose is to generate useless reports to secure their own spots. And to demand an explanation of falling index numbers in the midst of eliminating the very spots that feed their useless statistical reports is truly ignorant. Whoever authored the report demanding that data ought to have their spot eliminated immediately.

While these efforts are a tiny step in the right direction (overstaffed offices and desks), they are missing where the most fat needs to be trimmed - HQ. And we doubt that even as one of the top five exempts in the Department, Dugan has any power to trim those spots.

Labels:

48 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

New flash**** Dugan IS the stats guy. Numbers, numbers, numbers...

5/29/2009 12:06:00 AM  
Blogger Det. Shaved Longcock said...

COMMON SENSE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE CITY OF CHICAGO.

5/29/2009 12:09:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

look out in 001 days. stats are down and w/c wont be a commander


CW

5/29/2009 12:10:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bwaahhaaaa

5/29/2009 12:12:00 AM  
Blogger It's McTwitter! said...

Ace Reporter Phil Schitz's sources have their noses to the ground on this one. One source, who wished to remain anonymous said there is going to be some very SERIOUS problems this summer.

Looks like your bosses want the manpower out there before shit hits the fan.

5/29/2009 12:13:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They have more paper than they had 25 years ago. The computer age? Not with the chicago police department. Do you know why? Insecurity at the exempt level. None of them can ever say , " I did not know"--- NO ONE can know everything. What a joke.

Do they still have bus checks?


old retired guy

5/29/2009 12:18:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Haha I love it!!

If I were a Dist cmdr I would have followed that reorg order to the letter of the law! Let the shit roll

5/29/2009 12:19:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How will this effect the new performance elavuation system. It is all based on numbers. If no one is plugging them I will look like a fool

5/29/2009 12:25:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Stats - Stats - Stats ... Just go to the New and improved CAR meeting every Friday and see how STATS are being used. It's a Joke... "Cmdr: You have xx homicides and xx aggravated batteries in this time frame.. We know that your short xx on and the district was in a RAP every day" how are you moving your "resources" to combat your index crime increase ?"
Well, F##k your numbers on the board are wrong and don't have any one to enter activity not even a civilian, contact cards are being stacked in review and now it's the Tact secretary's job.
Aaahh wait... Does this mean data entry has an open time... Your Exempt meetings will be wonders without the NUMBERS!!!!!

5/29/2009 12:29:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Quick, call Office Depot, we need more paper!

5/29/2009 12:31:00 AM  
Anonymous HATER said...

speaking of the left hand my favorite of course!

WHAT IS THE DEAL W/ ALL THIS WEAK ASS TRAINING LATELY?

3 HOUR RUN AROUND AND PRETEND IM A SWAT GUY CMON 3 HOURS U FRICKING NUTZ!

I DONT RIGHT DUI TRAINING BECAUSE I DRINK AND DRIVE TRAINING! PLEASE WEAR UR SEATBELT...

ETHIC TRAININGS THAT STATE I CAN TAKE BRIBES UNDER 50$ DAMN AM I THAT CHEAP WHAT AM I AN ALDERMAN!

WATCH THIS VIDEO AND THAT VIDEO AND TELL EVERYONE IN THE FEDERAL LAWSUIT U WERE TRAINED! I DONT THINK SO HEY MISTER MAYOR THE NEXT TIME I HAVE TO GO TO CORP COUNCIL WHICH IS VERY SOON GUESS WHAT!

THE SUIT COMING UP WAS THE INCIDENT IN DOWNTOWN WHEN BOSSES ORDER OFFICERS TO LOCK PEOPLE UP 4 NO OBVIOUS REASON. IT SEEM ALL THE WHITE SHIRTS LOST DOCMENTS RELATED TO THE CASE AND R CALLING AROUND TRYING TO FIND OUT IF PEOPLE HAVE COPIES!!!

YOU LIKE RIGHTING ME UP 4 PARKING I LIKE COSTING THE CORP COUNCIL TIME AND CASH!

I FIGURE MY TIF MONEY WILL COVER IT SINCE IT DOESNT PAY ARE SALARY...

BEWARE OF THE DOG U DONT FEED AND SHIT ON HE WILL BITE BACK!!!

5/29/2009 12:33:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

good back on the streets where you should be!!! Time to start eliminating these clout heavy pussy spots! Start backing up the workers for a change!!! Take the load off me, the working guy who has to answer 50 calls a night! I have ZERO sympathy for these house mouses.... time to earn your paycheck!!!

5/29/2009 12:40:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This shit has been going on for a long time. The number crunchers just give the brass what they want to hear. It's amazing how dumb the brass really are. You would think they never wore a blue shirt. Just today I heard a secretary say to a girl she was training "just type these words and put in the numbers, that's what they want even if it never happened." I laughed to myself and just thought how sad this job has become. And they wonder why morale is gone.

5/29/2009 12:42:00 AM  
Anonymous Harrison Lifer said...

The numbers weren't down. They just weren't entered because the Officer who does stats was out of town.

*********************************

This reminds me of a great story.

Many moons ago, there was a copper working as a dispatcher on a zone that will remain anonymous. This prince of a (wo)man would often meet with us after his/her watch to partake in adult beverages.

Prior to embibing in his/her first refreshment, this copper would hand one of us a stack of (literally) hundreds of jobs "to be disposed of" that s/he refused to dispatch because s/he knew they were nonsense. This is back before any type of automation when calltakers would physically write the job tickets out and hand them to the dispatchers who would then assign them to the beat cars.

Even with this selective elimination of bullshit jobs, we'd still have a dozen or more jobs stacked to us right out of the gate, scribbling addresses, descriptions, etc. on whatever paper you could find in the squad car. It was great getting to a job that was 2 or more hours old!

Fast forward twenty years or so: either the administration would be begging him/her to come back to the job to work his/her magic in "crime reduction" or they'd be charging him/her with official misconduct. Good times!

Damn, how I miss the (not too long ago) old days!! If this particular dispatcher reads this, I hope retirement is treating you well. I tip my glass of Chivas Regal to you as I prepare to embark on yet another tour through the Wild Kingdom tomorrow. I may even write some bananas...

5/29/2009 12:50:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No more police at the gates and doors of the OEMC. Looks like a security firm has taken over.

5/29/2009 01:20:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

bad guy in custody, gun recovered in the 022 district crash incident.. anyone have any further info about it

5/29/2009 01:52:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OT: Perfect Example of today's police department. 022 district records 13 big arrests today one day after a policemans weapon is taken in a robbery. Why no outside units there? What are the Tact teams doing?

5/29/2009 02:06:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OT: SCC, I don't know why news of this is not circulating but I heard this afternoon that the SHITHEAD/SCUMBAG/LOWLIFE that took officer D.C.'s gun and wallet has been arrested this afternoon by some 7th dist Tac officers over in 003. If this is true.....WAY TO GO GUYS, AWESOME JOB. My hat goes off to them if this is true -GREAT POLICE WORK.
signed,
CPD 153

5/29/2009 03:01:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

WC has to do a report about why arrests are down. WC asked at roll call why we thought they were down. There was a pause and everybody in room, including WC, just started laughing. WC said the report will say because aliens abducted our criminals, that no one will even read it.

5/29/2009 03:59:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep in mind that if your activity (parkers, movers , contact cards etc)isn't being entered than that will relect when evaluations are done. Hello FOP are you there ?

5/29/2009 06:44:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

THIS IS THE CPD THAT I HAVE KNOWN FOR OVER 15YRS> SOMEBODY HAS TO TAKE THE BLAME NOT THE BOSSES

5/29/2009 07:09:00 AM  
Anonymous Hot Pursuit said...

WTF, this even has my big mouth speechless and part of the holy shit crowd...

So their going to make the bean counters hit the streets??? This could be a very scary summer.

5/29/2009 07:31:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Typical downtown fukstik mentality. Fuck you, your job is eliminated. Now go give me what I want anyway. Force someone ELSE to do the additional work of two or more officers.

Fuck these ignorant shitheads, they don't know SHIT about what's required of the personnel in district administrative positions to appease their pathetic bullshit paper mess and burning desire to constantly reinforce the "I outrank you" childish personality they ALL have.

The Area D/C ordered their commanders to cut at least one of the 5 contractually protected spots from CAPS. Not that the spot is guaranteed, but the bidding if filled is ignored.

But hey, guess what, SOMEBODY ELSE has to do their work on top of their OWN now. And no matter what most of you think, there are SEVERAL more jobs in a district CAPS office than the 5 officers assigned.

5/29/2009 07:37:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Phil Schitz here said...
Ace Reporter Phil Schitz's sources have their noses to the ground on this one. One source, who wished to remain anonymous said there is going to be some very SERIOUS problems this summer.

Looks like your bosses want the manpower out there before shit hits the fan.

5/29/2009 12:13:00 AM

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

Kid, take your wannabe crap elsewhere... no ones listening to your innuendo crap that everyone else already knows about.

Get a real job at an actual media outlet if you can, and use the blog as an information SOURCE, just like all great reporters do these days.

5/29/2009 07:39:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
look out in 001 days. stats are down and w/c wont be a commander


CW

5/29/2009 12:10:00 AM

Hope also that the useless do nothing keating gets dumped back to sgt rank, or is forced to retire!

5/29/2009 07:49:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
New flash**** Dugan IS the stats guy. Numbers, numbers, numbers...

5/29/2009 12:06:00 AM

dugan and entire exempt staff needs to go! what is ric flair been up to? WOOOO!

5/29/2009 07:57:00 AM  
Anonymous FLOP said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep in mind that if your activity (parkers, movers , contact cards etc)isn't being entered than that will relect when evaluations are done. Hello FOP are you there ?

5/29/2009 06:44:00 AM

We have the situation under review.

In the mean time make your plans to attend the picnic and golf outings.
For you long term planners remember to mark your calenders for breakfast with santa.

5/29/2009 08:08:00 AM  
Blogger John Northen said...

Damn, da job used to be so much fun. Locking up the bad guys and then, a couple of "in-service training" classes at the academy you could never forget.

In one, the instructor wanted to clue us in on the effects of cannabis. So the class fired up a few jays to pass around. I herein apologize for bogarting. I must say it was skunkweed. Bring on the good Hawaiian shit, bro.

Then there was the breathalyzer class for sergeants. The instructor told us at the noon break to bring back beer for a "test".

My old buddy from Fillmo', Leon Blair and I split a 12-pack. I forgot what we blew at the end.

I do remember we laughed our asses off. A shout-out to my brother Leon out there.

5/29/2009 08:14:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OT: Perfect Example of today's police department. 022 district records 13 big arrests today one day after a policemans weapon is taken in a robbery. Why no outside units there? What are the Tact teams doing?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
TRU was there

5/29/2009 10:08:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I first came on the job in the early 80's the tact offices still had pin maps for the index crimes. The tact lt. got called on the carpet about, say, thefts from auto by a clout heavy cmdr. The tact lt. started to remove a pin a day instead of adding one and since the paper trails in those days were so loose, when he showed the cmdr. how the density of the pins was thinning he was lauded as the best crime fighter out there. Twenty some years later and the smoke and mirrors still occur on a daily basis.

5/29/2009 10:09:00 AM  
Blogger It's McTwitter! said...

"Kid, take your wannabe crap elsewhere... no ones listening to your innuendo crap that everyone else already knows about.

Get a real job at an actual media outlet if you can, and use the blog as an information SOURCE, just like all great reporters do these days.

5/29/2009 07:39:00 AM"
--------------------------------

Dear Anonymous:

You know, that sounds like a great idea! Two problems:

(1.) Ace Reporter Phil Schitz doesn't listen to dipshits! And you're one of them!

(2.) Generally, I write satire. You may not get it, like it, or undrstand it. Too bad. I still have the 1st Amendment until Obama-nation takes it away.

One other thing: When you see, "Phil Schitz here", it's pronounced "Phil shits here."

Now, regarding the manpower reassignments:
Listen up genius, the economy is going to hell. It's not going to recover in six months, it's not bottoming out early next year, it's nose-diving.

You're fucked. I'm Fucked. We're all fucked.

About a half-million people per month are losing their jobs. What the hell do you think they're going to do? Sit on their hands and watch while their homes are foreclosed? The hell they will! They're going to protest. Once they find that protesting doesn't work, they'll turn to violence. This "kid" knows what he's talking about. If you want to know what's coming your way from the east, look at Europe. The middle class is rioting. If you want to know what's coming from the west, take a gander at California. The state will file for bankruptcy and that means government pensions are gone along with a whole myriad of other problems. Do you think people are going to sit idledly by as this shit happens?

Downtown is scrambling for bodies; not only for the expected summer violence, but for the upcoming civil unrest. One of the big problems the bosses don't realize or remember is this: Back in the 1960's there was a ton of civil unrest. If I recall correctly, the Chicago Polce Department lost close to a dozen coppers a year. Back then, your profession was all male with height and weight requirements. Now you have a department with a shit-load of females. Nothing against females on the police department, but when it comes to major shit hitting the fan, do you want testosterone or estrogen battling next to you? you have less police officers today than you had in the sixites. Counting the females: You have a lot less. Once again, nothing against the females.

Think the rioting won't reach our shores because we're too civilized? Look at London, England. The middle-class is joining up with the disenchanted in protest. The first protest had incidents of civil disorder. The following protests will have gradually increasing violence. If you want to see what's going on, travel the world. Lots of shit going on that you won't see on the news unless you watch the BBC news.

So all this "kid" is going to tell you is this: Keep drinking your Kool-Aid and everything will be fine.

Phil

5/29/2009 11:06:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cut the damn UNITS... tru, msf... stop robbing patrol to pay patrol!!!

5/29/2009 11:50:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep in mind that if your activity (parkers, movers , contact cards etc)isn't being entered than that will relect when evaluations are done.

---

Does that mean I won't ever get merit stripes? You mean, if I ever become a sergeant it'll have to be off of a test that will surely be legit (when it's offered in 2015)?

OMG, what will I do?????

5/29/2009 12:29:00 PM  
Anonymous 001 lot morning constitutional said...

Kid, take your wannabe crap elsewhere... no ones listening to your innuendo crap that everyone else already knows about.

^^^^^^^^^

Lighten up sparky.

5/29/2009 12:46:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No more police at the gates and doors of the OEMC. Looks like a security firm has taken over.

5/29/2009 01:20:00 AM
--------
Yup, minimum wage security guards are now all that'll stand between a terrorist and our 'state of the art'dispatch and communications center. Swell.

Not that the bored, apathetic, dismal so-called officers sitting at that desk were really any better.

5/29/2009 03:30:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
New flash**** Dugan IS the stats guy. Numbers, numbers, numbers...

5/29/2009 12:06:00 AM


Yeah, well I'm the DDS guy and it stands for Doesn't Do Shit!

When the contract s settled. next year, I return to normal activity, till then fuck Daley, fuck Dugan and fuck Weis.

If we matterred at all to those fucks they would be screaming along with us to settle the damn contract. As it is, it is obvious we are going to arbitration soon so fuck them all!

Back each other up and stay safe, all the rest, the bosses can go pound salt up their ass.

5/29/2009 04:57:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think all the whiny assed crybaby police on this blog should just shut up, enjoy the nightly RAP's, keep bringing in the numbers and leave us Office Dolly-House Mousies(who talk like we are the REAL poleese) ALONE!!!!

Stop worrying about who we are "knowing and blowing" and brown-nosing!!!
We will be HIDDEN EVEN BETTER, now because WE deserve OUR spots!!!

-Mickey and Minnie Kneepad-Cheesebiters
(Unit/District Undisclosed)

5/29/2009 07:02:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lost a dozen a year? More coppers in the sixties than now? GFY, you have no idea what you're saying, moron.

5/29/2009 07:47:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"STATS" guy? Isn't that what got the former SOS in the jam they were in? Bringing in all those "STATS"?

Bosses downtown never seem to learn, no matter who they are.

old retired guy

5/29/2009 08:05:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just because someone works inside does not make that person a dog, Those who work the street are all not workers

5/29/2009 08:11:00 PM  
Anonymous WESTSIDE 30 PLUS DICK. said...

Phil Schitz here said...
Ace Reporter Phil Schitz's sources
-----------------------------------
To the above. You are a twit. You must be one of those no y.o.j. generation Xer or Yer.

Now go play with you dolls in the basement of A/3 you punk.

5/29/2009 09:07:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

001 days WC off his meds, bi-polar all the way. Just hope he doesn't move up

5/29/2009 10:29:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kid, take your wannabe crap elsewhere... no ones listening to your innuendo crap that everyone else already knows about.
---------
inmyendo? no, innuendo. so there.

5/29/2009 10:54:00 PM  
Anonymous Phil Myazz said...

Phil Shitz...good one.

5/30/2009 01:00:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Where is ---------AZ--:-)------. I miss him really badly.

5/30/2009 09:04:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Northside,

You're crazy. That's a compliment.

5/30/2009 09:46:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

TRU was there

5/29/2009 10:08:00 AM



And what, pray tell, did TRU acomplish?

5/30/2009 01:48:00 PM  
Anonymous Jody said...

No more police at the gates and doors of the OEMC. Looks like a security firm has taken over.

5/29/2009 01:20:00 AM
--------
Yup, minimum wage security guards are now all that'll stand between a terrorist and our 'state of the art'dispatch and communications center. Swell.

Not that the bored, apathetic, dismal so-called officers sitting at that desk were really any better.

5/29/2009 03:30:00 PM

HEY YOU! You better watch out about what you are saying about security guards at OEMC! That’s part of a $310,000 a year decision! I get paid the “big bucks” around here, and I make the final say so! After all, I’m one of those certified “Expert Terrorists”, Mayor Daley said so! What are you? I used to be a fed, now everyone seems to just be FED-UP. What the fuck? Don’t people like you get it? I AM SOMEBODY, DAMNIT! I sold my soul so I can make important decisions like this.

5/30/2009 02:00:00 PM  

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