Nice Fire Department Conehead

Courtesy of the Contrarian, this isn't dangerous at all:

• Here is something with which all Chicago residents should be racked by anxiety. Yesterday, as CFD battled a fire at 74th and Yates in South Shore, the Battalion Chief declared an extra alarm and requested a tower ladder.
  
  
  Woefully, the closest tower ladder available across the entire city was located at Grace and Damen. This ladder traveled 156 blocks — some TWENTY MILES — to respond to the extra alarm.
  
  
  This is an utter outrage.
  
  
  Of the ten tower ladders in Chicago, 5, 10, 16, 24, 39, and 54, all are out of service. At the moment, only four tower ladders are in service, TLs 14, 21, 23, and 63, all of which are stationed on the North and West Sides of the city. This leaves the whole of the South Side of Chicago —which unfortunately experiences a higher number of fires — without sufficient equipment to fight large-scale fires.
  
  
  This shortage of equipment is inexcusable and undeniably imperils residents whose taxes pay for fire protection. This equipment shortage also creates dangerous conditions for CFD called on to fight fires.
  
  
  So, now that you know, @ChicagosMayor, are you going to do something about this?

Here's exactly what Conehead is going to do about it:

• declare this is the result of systemic racist within the CFD; 
• spend another $400 million on ILLEGAL ALIENS; 
• have a nervous breakdown

Is any enterprising "reporter"  going to pick up on this story? Maybe figure out the average age of a whole shitload of CFD apparatus? Find out when the last time was that CFD was able to buy a new engine / truck / tower? See if the rumor we had over a year ago about CFD losing it's Federal accreditation due to poorly maintained out-of-date equipment is any closer to happening?