Saturday, September 18, 2010

Shot Twice in Nine Hours

  • A South Side man is cursed — or terribly lucky — depending on your point of view.

    The 23-year-old man was shot twice this morning in different neighborhoods and survived.

    “Someone is trying real hard to kill this guy,” one police source said.

Hopefully, that "someone" succeeds shortly. And without killing anyone else either.

And on the bright side, the Predictive Analysis Unit can just stick a tracker on this jackass and predict with pretty much 100% certainty that he'll be a target again shortly.

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25 Comments:

Anonymous 013th District Copper said...

And yet this "victim" probably refuses to cooperate with the police because he is afraid they may come after him again!

9/18/2010 12:19:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

newsflash....dont drink you 40 next to this guy!

9/18/2010 07:04:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This guy must be a real @$$hole if everybody seems to be out to shoot him.

9/18/2010 07:43:00 AM  
Blogger kateykakes said...

Who cares if he's gone? That's one less POS on the street.

And yeah, I'm a bit cynical lately.

9/18/2010 08:17:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Third time is the charm.

9/18/2010 08:55:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I heard J Fed only counts this as one incident since it was the same victim shot twice

9/18/2010 08:57:00 AM  
Anonymous Capt. Obvious said...

A simple case of mistaken identity...twice.

9/18/2010 09:27:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Shit, how just how much money in "free" emergency care does this shithead get to steal from the taxpayers.

9/18/2010 09:31:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Here's hoping for the "hat trick".

9/18/2010 09:45:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Off Topic but I had a great conversation with a fine citizen last night after dispersing a large crowd.
It went like this.
"Officer, can I ask You a question?"
"Sure, but don't walk up on my car. You can ask me from there."
"Did Yall catch who killed my..."
"Hey get up on the sidewalk before you get hit by a car."
"While Yall over here doin all this... messin with us... did you catch who killed my nephew yet?"
"Over here doin all this? You mean doin my job? I don't know. What was his name?"
"His name was...(Name withheld)"
"Yeah I remember him! He got shot right here around the same time a few weeks ago. You were out here with a whole bunch of people just like now! Nobody'd tell us shit about what happened cause you were all too busy runnin around screamin about how you was gonna get who did it, so no, I have not personally caught anyone for your nephew's murder. Have you guys decided to cooperate and follow up with the Detectives assigned to the case?"
"Man Fuck You."
"That's what I thought. Now get off the street. Oh, and I'm sorry for your loss." "Hey partner, let's go get some coffee."

9/18/2010 10:21:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...If at first you don't succeed, try again?

9/18/2010 11:27:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

only 7 lives left....

9/18/2010 01:03:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

WOW, that's a bad day! A really bad day!

Is it possible, he works for Target, and was in uniform? or is just a complete asshole?

Either way, it makes for a bad day indeed.

9/18/2010 01:21:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can we please find him.... I'd like to offer him a 1 million dollar life insurance policy... I'll pay the premium!! 70/30 split

9/18/2010 04:37:00 PM  
Blogger Phil Schitz here said...

Apparently, this young fella' has issues with some people. May I suggest Dale Carnegies' "How To Make Friends and Influence People"

9/18/2010 05:21:00 PM  
Anonymous The Box Chevy Phantom said...

9/18/2010 10:21:00 AM

LMFAO!

Shit-head: "Did you catch who killed my nephew yet?"

Police: "Have you guys decided to cooperate and follow up with the detectives..."

Shit-head: "Man, fuck you."

We know EXACTLY where you're coming from, Office!

Some years back we rolled up on a just occurred person shot before the calls hit the board at the zone.

Gunpowder still in the air and dude is laid the fuck out like a king oscar sardine with a third eye in his forehead and 50 silly motherfuckers standing around looking like "huh?" when we asked whodunit and which way did they go.

They watched these two fools box until one got tired of taking an ass beating and popped dude dead in the forehead. He was dead before he hit the pavement.

The funny part was they had the nerve to be pissed. We found out why at the hospital. it was all dope bullshit and these fools knew each other. The Police showed up right when the crowd was going to rob the dead guy! A loaded strap, an extra clip, more than $2k and a couple of packs were on the person of the deceased.

Ahhh... So much fun!

But these are the fools who are the kings and queens of Chicago who get THEIR ASSES KISSED by the politicians just for being oxygen thieves while we who get off that ass and go to work to deal with their bullshit get pissed on constantly.

These are the ones the majority of citizens want to make friends with since The Police have been cast as the enemy in this town.

9/18/2010 11:45:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The only problem is that he didn't get shot good enough.

9/19/2010 12:00:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Another CPS honor role student.

9/19/2010 07:05:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

WOW that is amazing. I bet this guy is sure glad that he isn't a CPS honor student or he would be dead by now.

9/19/2010 08:06:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just another example of the phenomenon known as the douchebag factor. It is a fact that your odds of being killed by a bullet are directly proportional to the level of your douchebagness.

For example, some asswipe gang banger with 30 kids by 20 women, unemployed, in and out of the system, tats of all his "bitches" on every inch of his worthless body - will ultimately be autopsied and at least a handful of oxidized rounds will be found in his worthless gullet from previous attempts on his life.

A baby or a an ACTUAL honor student gets clipped in the foot and bleeds out.

It's just not fair. It's almost to the point where maybe the police should start acting more like the gangbangin' shitheads they police - so at least you guys can be almost as bulletproof as they are.

I used to think it was just because these fucking mopes couldn't shoot straight if the gun was in a vise, but it is far more sinister than that - they really are bulletproof.

9/19/2010 01:50:00 PM  
Anonymous noone90210 said...

If that man has common sense, he should move out of town, have cosmetic surgery and obtain a new identity. Maybe he is a real @$$hole or just dumb.

9/19/2010 02:08:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just another example of the phenomenon known as the douchebag factor. It is a fact that your odds of being killed by a bullet are directly proportional to the level of your douchebagness.
-------
That would be inversely proportional and I agree wholeheartedly.

9/20/2010 01:38:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Here's hoping for the 'hat trick.'"

--9/18/2010 09:45:00 AM

"Don't die on me, Willie!"

9/20/2010 01:37:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I used to think it was just because these f__ing mopes couldn't shoot straight if the gun was in a vise, but it is far more sinister than that - they really are bulletproof."

--9/19/2010 01:50:00 PM

Saw one on a bicycle come barreling through a red light -- WHAM! -- right into an old-fashioned Yellow Cab (the indestructible Checker Marathon -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Checker_Taxi) who was rolling on the green light.

Bicycle goes flying, M/1 goes up the hood, across the windshield, and falls off to the side.

You or me would have been in the hospital in multiple traction, hooked up to tubes, machines going "beep...beep...beep," doctors having hushed conversations.

This character comes right back up off the pavement like a rubber ball, fists clenched, screaming obscenities at the driver.

"HEY! SHUT THE F__K UP! I SAW THE WHOLE THING! YOU RAN THE LIGHT!"

Still muttering, he twists the handlebars back into place, hops on, and goes wobbling away on the bent wheels...

I wonder where he is today...

9/20/2010 02:05:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That would be inversely proportional and I agree wholeheartedly.

9/20/2010 01:38:00 AM

You are right and I should be more careful when I post.

9/21/2010 12:32:00 AM  

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