Fata$$ Falls Down

Reports say he was filming another one of those "lakefront walk" commercials he's been running for months now.

Tsunami Warnings have been issued, beaches have been evacuated:

• A rare 2.9 magnitude earthquake was recorded Wednesday near the north suburbs, United States Geological Survey officials said.

  The earthquake happened in Lake Michigan around 2:38 p.m.

  USGS officials said the location of the earthquake was about 13.8 miles northeast of Evanston.

Fortunately, no one was injured when Porkulous fell though we did hear that one State Trooper sprained his ankle leaping out of the way.