Conspiracy Time!
So the latest killings were perpetrated by:
- an individual on a bicycle and
- an individual shooting from a gangway
One of our readers waggishly suggested that Rahm ban bicycles and gangways as a deterrent to crime.
We however, wondered if the 650 miles of bike lanes being built at $140,000 per mile are part of a nefarious plan to facilitate murders across minority communities by racists posing as "green enthusiasts" riding bicycles.
We haven't figured out the gangway angle yet, but it'll come to us eventually. All plots by evil cabals come to light once you unravel one section. Look at the Kennedy assassination.
The bikes and the bike lanes are the first discovered portion of the plot.
Labels: sarcasm AND silliness
posted by SCC at 12:02 AM
24 Comments:
A couple years ago just about every thug on a bike near Broadway and Wilson had a gun. Thug Life has figured out ditching a bike is easier than a car and it allows shooter to get right up on his future homocide victim.
"We however, wondered if the 650 miles of bike lanes being built at $140,000 per mile are part of a nefarious plan to facilitate murders across minority communities by racists posing as "green enthusiasts" riding bicycles."
i'll take it under consideration.
"We haven't figured out the gangway angle yet, but it'll come to us eventually."
candygram.
Chalkie
I don't think they have gangways In New York, maybe they will have to be cemented up.
For the benefit of non-Chicagoan readers "gangway" is a distinctly Chicago word. Chicago houses are now mostly heated with natural gas, before that they were warmed with heating oil, and originally they were heated with coal. Furnaces were located in the rear basements of large buildings. In Chicago there is approximately a 4 foot space inbetween buildings. Coal would be delivered by a truck parked out in front of the building and coal would be wheel barreled to a hole in the side of the building which was close to the furnace. The deliverymen were referred to as the 'coal gang' and the space inbetween buildings in Chicago is known as a 'gangway' even though coal in no longer used as fuel.
Rahm truly hates Chicago. 13 people shot in 2 hours...insane. I'm pretty sure hiring more cops would have been a much better choice for that $90 million. But, no one gets rich from hiring more cops. Rahm's head is so far up his ass that he can see his dinner as he digests it.
$91 million available for bike lanes, when just last year that asshole mayor of ours was asking McCompstat to cut $90 million from the Cpd budget. It's amazing what these politicians find important to spend our money on, and if I have to hear that nine and a half fingered cocksucker say "it's not tax dollars it's federal money" one more time I'm gonna lose my mind.
Drive-by's will become cycle-by's because even the dumbest maggot on the south or west side, (not that there are many bike lanes there) will realize he's got a better chance of getting caught by getting stuck in vehicle gridlock. With a bike you can book miles away and then blend in---although the Lake St. Corridor has bike lanes, right? Or we'll see a big increase in traffic crashes with bad guys going the wrong way, veering into other lanes, etc. in an effort to get away.
Don't forget porch sitting and just standing around.
Wasn't that the 018 D/C's peeve, don't allow the Cambridgers to sit around in front of their subsidized tenament?
The next solution to come will be expand police districts boundaries, to 'spreads that crime around', equal the playin field.
Combining 011 & 10, 009 & 008, 025 & 016 etc, will perceptually lower them CompStat, um hmm.
GMacDaddy & Rahmfurtër are losers. No accolades - no future. Start packing those moving boxes.
Tales from The Sanctuary City.
"Gangway" = Private bike lanes connected to the public bike lanes. Perfect place for me to hang out.
Quid pro quo- Something that is given for something else in return.
Cops are real cheap when it come to making campaign contributions to politicians in exchange for EARNING their own salary. They have other plans for that money, like providing for their family.
Contractors and construction companies, on the other hand, understand the political language of 'quid pro quo'. They understand, for example, if a donor gives a charity $100 and receives a concert ticket valued at $40, the donor has made a quid pro quo contribution. In Chicagoese, if a company makes a $5000 campaign contribution to Rahm Emanuel, and the company is rewarded with a multi-MILLION DOLLAR contract to build 650 miles of bike lanes, THAT would be a 'quid pro quo' transaction, especially if that arrangement were discussed ahead of time. Outside of political circles, this would be known as fraud, bid-rigging, extortion, and a felony!
No wonder the murder rate here is so high and is very low in N.Y. for the size of the city. New York doesn't have any gangways in most of the areas if at all.
BTW why wouldn't shooters use these to help them do thier shooting. They are called GANGways. And the ones doing the shooting are GANGbangers It only seems natural. Maybe the brain trust(McJerseyshore & 9.5) will have these renamed now.
For the benefit of non-Chicagoan readers "gangway" is a distinctly Chicago word. Chicago houses are now mostly heated with natural gas, before that they were warmed with heating oil, and originally they were heated with coal. Furnaces were located in the rear basements of large buildings. In Chicago there is approximately a 4 foot space inbetween buildings. Coal would be delivered by a truck parked out in front of the building and coal would be wheel barreled to a hole in the side of the building which was close to the furnace. The deliverymen were referred to as the 'coal gang' and the space inbetween buildings in Chicago is known as a 'gangway' even though coal in no longer used as fuel.
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Thanks for the info because I never knew why it was called a gang way.
Gang way. It's right there in the name - tacit approval of homicidal activity. Perhaps if they changed it to "citizen way," or "honor student way" there would be a significant drop in crime.
In Uptown the "bike-by" is the preferred method for gunning down a rival. A couple years ago 023 had about 7 incidents where bikes were used. I think we need bike registratiom, licensing and taxing so that we can have our bike guys doing bike enforcement to prevent these shootings and killings. It's for the children.
When the Border Patrol finds a tunnel under the fenceline they concrete it up. I say we have S&S concrete up all the gangways in the ghetto. Imagine the amount of crime that could prevent!
Fuck the bikes, kids and all of 9.5's bullshit. When does he leave?
Didn't Rahm tell the bangers to "take it to the Alley"...well, how do you get to the alley?...through the gangway!
His plan is working, expect a press conference soon!
CHALKIE said...
"Gangway" = Private bike lanes connected to the public bike lanes. Perfect place for me to hang out.
8/24/2012 07:19:00 AM
i don't 'hang', neither 'out' nor 'in'.
i roll.
Chalkie
Let us not forget that Rudy Lozano's killer escaped on a bicycle--Naw, you new guys don't know who he was.....happened about 25 yrs ago in 010.
For the benefit of non-Chicagoan readers "gangway" is a distinctly Chicago word. Chicago houses are now mostly heated with natural gas, before that they were warmed with heating oil, and originally they were heated with coal. Furnaces were located in the rear basements of large buildings. In Chicago there is approximately a 4 foot space inbetween buildings. Coal would be delivered by a truck parked out in front of the building and coal would be wheel barreled to a hole in the side of the building which was close to the furnace. The deliverymen were referred to as the 'coal gang' and the space inbetween buildings in Chicago is known as a 'gangway' even though coal in no longer used as fuel.
8/24/2012 02:24:00 AM
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Or, more simply, a gangway is a paved walkway between residential buildings.
Anonymous said...
For the benefit of non-Chicagoan readers "gangway" is a distinctly Chicago word. Chicago houses are now mostly heated with natural gas, before that they were warmed with heating oil, and originally they were heated with coal. Furnaces were located in the rear basements of large buildings. In Chicago there is approximately a 4 foot space inbetween buildings. Coal would be delivered by a truck parked out in front of the building and coal would be wheel barreled to a hole in the side of the building which was close to the furnace. The deliverymen were referred to as the 'coal gang' and the space inbetween buildings in Chicago is known as a 'gangway' even though coal in no longer used as fuel.
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Thanks for the info because I never knew why it was called a gang way.
8/24/2012 09:39:00 AM
Sorry to inform you but the word "gangway" originated long before Chicago became a city. I know this because I actually looked it up in the dictionary.
Sorry to inform you but the word "gangway" originated long before Chicago became a city. I know this because I actually looked it up in the dictionary.
8/24/2012 09:46:00 PM
Is your dictionary from before the founding of Chicago? Words are added to the dictionary all the time to keep up with the current lingo.
Thanks Officer Bugasky for the Chicago history on gangways!
Total Nerd
PS In the hoods of Chicago, the gangways have always been used to dodge police and conduct business.
We are in a depression. With these gas prices even an OG has to save a buck here and there. Drive-by Ride-by. Who cares, he dead ain't he?
Dear Anonymous with a dictionary,
The article I commented on used the word 'gangway' in the manner Chicagoans use it on a day-to-day basis.
I told why 'gangway' and its usage came about in Chicago and how 'gangway' has a distinct meaning in Chicago.
I defined this word so a non-Chicagoan, such as yourself, would understand that a ship or boat did not suddenly appear and that an offender [not a 'perp'] wasn't sailing away shomehow.
'Gangway', as used in Chicago, has a meaning and definition not used by the rest of our country.
I am glad you know how to use a dictionary.
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