Tuesday, November 18, 2014

A Humble Suggestion

Maybe one of these for the Craft Pizza folks:

  • Chilean students of engineering have designed a prototype bicycle that ‘cannot be stolen.’

    The Yerka, which is designed by Cristobal Cabello, Andres Roi Eggers and Juan Jose Monsalve during a college engineering class, can be locked by some of its own parts.

    The students came up with the idea after Roi’s bike was stolen.

    The Chilean innovators have benefitted from techniques used in two other bicycles namely “Seatylock” and “Denny,” whose saddle and detachable handlebars are respectively used for locking them up.

    For Yerka to get locked, its lower frame opens up into two arms that are then connected to the seat post and locked to a post.

    Thieves would have to destroy the whole bike to get it unlocked, said Cabello, adding, “That’s why our motto is ‘a bike that gets stolen is no longer a bike.’ What we have here is truly an unstealable bike.”
This might test the ingenuity of bike thieves.

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30 Comments:

Blogger ustation said...

Viva Chile!

11/18/2014 12:17:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

IT'S INGENIOUS ---- unless of course the Stroller Gang spies with their beady little eyes

11/18/2014 12:39:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No one would ever want to steal that bike...

...it's baldass U G L Y with those ghetto colored tires...

wait a minute, what am I sayin'..

...never mind.

11/18/2014 12:41:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bike thieves have nothing but time. There is no theft proof bike.

11/18/2014 01:20:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Looks like the tires come off... See plenty of tireless frames all over Chiraq-central...

11/18/2014 01:43:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They'll find a way, I remember when LoJack was thought to be the wave of the future - it's not, someone will post a video about this, and there's always the monkey in the trunk anti-theft device

11/18/2014 02:06:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, the patent files are full of 100 years of goofy bicycle inventions. Nothing really beats the classic lugged-and-brazed, strong, basic diamond frame with good-quality butted tubing -- you just have to lock it up good. This is just a contraption. Lots of weak points, no provision to carry anything, etc. Saw something like this concept in Popular Mechanics back in the 1940s.

Amusing in the recent context, though -- but how do you deal with people who "won't lock the back gate anymore because someone might get hurt climbing over it?" You can't.

11/18/2014 02:47:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No need for that crazy bike. All you need to know is why, in Chicago, bikes are stolen, then go forth and address those social problems. A little understanding will go a long ways.

11/18/2014 03:12:00 AM  
Blogger Crime In Boystown said...

So, it's scrap.

11/18/2014 06:13:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love when people lock their bikes to sucker poles and they're baffled by how the thieves stole the bike. Step 1: lift pole from the base. Step 2: take bike. Step 3: watch Chad, Lance or Becky from Naperville pout and cry in their skinny jeans and complain about how the cops don't do their job.

11/18/2014 09:11:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Arrested a guy once that removed the sign from the post and lifted the bike over the top.

11/18/2014 09:14:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As a young tact guy I remember a series of bike thefts at the same location and every victim claimed they had it locked to a stop sign or similar pole on the same block.
After a tour of the area we found a bunch of bikes again locked to the poles.
A closer inspection found all of the sign poles not bolted to the bottom base secured to the ground.
A short stakeout later, we watched a van drive up, simply lift the unsecured pole from the base thereby detaching the bike from its alleged fixed object and carried into the van where they later cut the locking device off in their garage.
Like it was mentioned above, there is no such thing as a theft proof bike.
Welcome to Chicago.

11/18/2014 10:06:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, blame the victim for thinking a 10 foot tall fence with curved bars on the top is suitable protection, combined with an obvious security camera and outside window with a view inside. Victim's fault he didn't do MORE.

11/18/2014 10:37:00 AM  
Blogger Mr. SouthSide said...

I can see myself cruising around the 'Ville on that baby.

11/18/2014 11:54:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If there are folding parts that have to be seperated to secure the bike to a pole/rack, then there's the weak point that the urban yutes will crack. Piece of shit.

11/18/2014 12:55:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If you watch the video, there is a key on the outside end of the bottom section, near the pedal. I think a old school slide puller would take care of that.....

11/18/2014 02:23:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If there's a lock- and there is- it can be defeated.

11/18/2014 03:20:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The seat tube should be fitted to fire a 20 gauge shot shell... Death to all thieves.

11/18/2014 03:56:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The real test... Park the bike in englewood overnight.

11/18/2014 04:06:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Yeah, blame the victim for thinking a 10 foot tall fence with curved bars on the top is suitable protection, combined with an obvious security camera and outside window with a view inside. Victim's fault he didn't do MORE.

11/18/2014 10:37:00 AM

Do MORE? The 'victim' did nothing at all.
It's the big city; grow up and lock the bike.

11/18/2014 06:11:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I love when people lock their bikes to sucker poles and they're baffled by how the thieves stole the bike. Step 1: lift pole from the base. Step 2: take bike. Step 3: watch Chad, Lance or Becky from Naperville pout and cry in their skinny jeans and complain about how the cops don't do their job.

11/18/2014 09:11:00 AM


I took a report from a Becky type who got her bike lifted after parking it all day in front of a Brown Line Station. Cable lock was sliced no problem.

She was in tears. She explained to me how much the bike meant to her, how she "bonded" to the bike and what were the chances of getting it back.

When I told her the chances were near zero suddenly I became the bad guy. I didn't tell her that she was stupid for leaving it with a cheap ass cable and lock in front of a CTA station ALL FUCKING DAY! She was from Iowa and still has to learn Street Survival - Chicago 101.

11/18/2014 07:41:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The old saying, "Nothing is foolproof because fools are so ingenious," could also be applied to thieves.

11/18/2014 09:19:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

The real test... Park the bike in englewood overnight.

11/18/2014 04:06:00 PM

Mmmm-Hmmm...

Motherfuckers up ALL NIGHT taking 30 second nibbles with a portable reciprocating saw or grinding wheel to cut down the lamp post this bike is secured to...

It doesn't matter if the bike is essentially unrideable.

They GOTTA get at it just because some poor slob thought enough of the damned thing to secure it...

Whodafuk y'all think y'all is lockin' shit up from THEM?

"Yo cuz... Imma git dat muhfukka..."
>WHEEEE-BRRZZZZZZZT!<

These are the actual masters of Chicago.
Not you funny thinkers who drag that tired ass
to work without fail.

11/18/2014 10:20:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

>>>Anonymous said...
No need for that crazy bike. All you need to know is why, in Chicago, bikes are stolen, then go forth and address those social problems. A little understanding will go a long ways.

11/18/2014 03:12:00 AM<<<
.
Stolen Bikes as a Social Issue.

How about the issue of lack of morality, lack of social responsibility, lack of work ethic.

OH I see Mr. Liberal Troll, let's tax the fewer and fewer working people to provide free bicycles like they provide free telephones to the non-working. All the free phones they want through the "Universal Service Fees" on our Phone Bills. We could have a "Universal Transportation Fee" on all of the bicycles we buy.

But the non-working would not be satisfied with generic Government Issue Bicycles. They would want the specials with the 10 speed derailleurs and titanium frames.

And if the taxpayers give the non-working bicycles, then they should give them cars and all the gas they want.

11/18/2014 11:20:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A scene I'd like to see in a movie.

Someone needs to do a video of a bicycle locked to a post some where.

When the offender come with his bolt cutters and starts cutting an unseen person unloads on his ass with one of those full automatic paintball guns that's loaded half paint half pepper balls.

I'd laugh myself silly.

11/18/2014 11:31:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"These are the actual masters of Chicago.
Not you funny thinkers who drag that tired ass
to work without fail."

11/18/2014 10:20:00 PM

...and have you noticed that none of them ever lock their bikes?

Lock? S__t. Throw it on its side in the doorway of the store so that other people have to step over it.

When they come out with their hot-pickle-in-a-plastic-bag, they hop on and ride around crazy, smashing the thing over curbs until the wheels pretzel, then hop off and just leave it for the scrap truck to pick up.

You didn't work for it, you don't really need it, you don't care about it.

11/19/2014 01:56:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Yeah, blame the victim for thinking a 10 foot tall fence with curved bars on the top is suitable protection, combined with an obvious security camera and outside window with a view inside..."

11/18/2014 10:37:00 AM

None of which stopped jack s__t, did it? Huh?

"Psychological barriers" don't work against the brainless.

These people don't care about your "security camera;" they beat victims senseless and then post their own videos on Youtube, F__ebook.

...and now the owner is going to help by leaving the gate unlocked "so that no one gets hurt climbing over it," and someone else chips in here, going to give the thieves more bicycles to sell "for the asking."

Hopeless.



11/19/2014 02:05:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't proselytize anymore. I'll just get an argument back anyway. "You're paranoid."

Fact -- Your unlocked bike right next to my locked one is my best insurance.

Thank you!


11/19/2014 02:11:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Arrested a guy once that removed the sign from the post and lifted the bike over the top.

11/18/2014 09:14:00 AM

Me too. Two guys working on double signs downtown to get two bikes chained together. Took them about 50 minutes. They can hardly lift the bikes over, and really struggled. They were very mad after they put the bikes in the car and got caught. They worked so hard, poor babies, they beefed on me. I really miss those days of watching all that hard work and the bad guy's face when he realizes he's been had. LMAO This was funny.

Retired

11/19/2014 03:49:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"This might test the ingenuity of bike thieves" lol. This would represent too much work for too little gain. Ingenuity suggests more than the common Chiraq bicycle thief is capable of.

11/19/2014 09:21:00 PM  

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