Get to the Choppa!
- The
Chicago Police Department is expected to have a new state-of-the-art
helicopter in its now meager fleet in time for the Democratic National
Convention and officials say the price is right.
Duane Devries, the Police Department's Deputy Chief of Special Operations, said the department has desperately needed a new police helicopter for a while.
Chicago Police do not have a state- of- the -art helicopter, though one of their outdated ones has an upgraded camera.
Devries said the Democratic National Convention is buying the city an new $11 million police chopper that will be used during the party gathering in August.
The new helicopter will be outfitted with all of the latest equipment including
- is fueled by clean burning unicorn farts emitting zero greenhouse gases
- a backup electric generator
- an extra backup of solar panels
- a speed restriction device to make pursuits impossible
- a camera system that filters out all colors to prevent racial profiling - it only sees white
- (unless the white person is wearing all black clothing and masks and carrying an umbrella - then it filters them out, too)
- a sooper-seekret-special filter that spots red baseball hats and launches high explosive missiles at anyone wearing one
It will take about a year to train up a DEI qualified crew, so don't expect it to be operational this year.
Labels: sarcasm AND silliness
posted by SCC at 12:01 AM
40 Comments:
How the hell did this accurate specifications list leak out?
Only the connected contractors were supposed to have it.
Assuming the manufacturer can get the bird built and delivered in 4 months (unlikely), you still need a flight crew that is type-certified. Since CPD’s current birds are somewhere between ante-diluvian and prehistoric, the crew(s) will need to be retrained and recertified in type as well as educated on all the new, whiz-bang toys it comes with.
Who’s going to pick up the tab for all that training or is it included in the $11mil? Rotor-wing flight school don’t come cheap.
Is the training going to be concurrent with the build or will it wait until the bird is delivered?
If the former, they might get it in the air this year but not in time for the DNC.
If the latter, it’ll be a year from now.
Glance at some of the police departments and size of their fleets.
LAPD: 16 helicopters & 1 fixed wing aircraft
LA County Sheriff: 18
NYPD: 8
Las Vegas: 5
Phoenix: 9 & 3 fixed wing aircraft
Atlanta: 3
Denver: 2
Snelling said Chicago has 3 but they are down a lot for maintenance. That has been the problem for decades.
If the Democratic Convention is buying one for the City there is a catch to it. It won’t be in service for law enforcement but will be used to fly the ranking Democrat politicians from O’Hare, to a secure areas around the United Center, McCormick Place, and lakefront area for access to downtown hotels. These politicians will be shielded from all the protests which are inevitable. And then after the convention it will disappear.
Maybe his two so called drivers, VM or AP could man the chopper. Oh wait they are never at work. One lives in the Suburb's and the other works for the Cubs while he is suppose to be at CPD.
Wonder how fast it falls from the sky after take off ?
What a waste. We need decent equipment not lunatic doesn’t work stuff.
Great sarcasm SCC. Since ferals are always white now, does that affect the birth rate statistics and free bee availability?
LOL....now that's some funny s**t. Keep up the good work.
You are getting pretty ballsy as you approach retirement. I like it.
maybe if there was a helicopter up there when juicy smolley was jumped by the 2 white guys wearing robes with hoods and MAGA hats they would have been caught,,,,, hahahahahaha
What did the current helicopter ever achieve?
Or... get several high tech drones at a fraction of the cost of purchase and maintenance.
Did they trade in the lemons stuck on the ground?
Lake County Indiana Sheriff has three helicopters which they use to assist officers in chasing criminals back into Illinois quite frequently. In Chicago you coppers can’t chase a loose dog without a supervisor’s permission, they have turned you from police officers to glorified report writers. For what? A higher paying job with the diminishing hope of a pension, one that requires you to live in a shit city, where you are treated like a criminal while criminals are treated like victims.
What about males traveling in pairs?
When it is not spreading Conehead campaign rhetoric, they can follow AOC's idea and use it to power wind turbines on non windy days. Always gotta think green.
Is there a “pool” chopper they can use? Greasy steering wheel, no air in tires, out of gas and chicken bones under the seat?
Buwahahahahahahaha!!!
10-1 tony from 008
What the hell ever happened to Army/Navy/Marines/Air Force surplus sales?
Flying Fucking Uber for the DemoRats to be transported from O’Hara Airport to the DNC ! Complements of the tax payers as usual !
Anonymous said...
Or... get several high tech drones at a fraction of the cost of purchase and maintenance.
4/13/2024 07:35:00 AM
Only problem that their use in Illinois by law enforcement is severely limited by law.
we also need NEW vehicles and MORE sworn officers !!!!!
Get a hot air balloon instead.
The chopper is a great asset, the old birds should have been replaced years ago. Now that they have new birds they are going to burn out the four pilots they have. Maybe if a pilot made as much as a fto does they would have more people applying. Bs city politics as usual
Who is going to fly these choppers? Maybe that dorky retired Capt from the 008th district again? They used to have one stationed at 51st & Wentworth but the ghetto rats beefed that it was always flying around the ghetto just like they beefed that the aggressive Task Force guys with the TF on their shoulder patch only worked in the ghetto.
Nobody had the balls to tell the ghetto rats that the ghetto is where most of the crime is and all that was scrapped for political reasons by the democrats.
DEI
Division
Exclusion
Indocrination
I say this as a former army attack helicopter pilot. Ditch the helicopters, to expensive, to much maintenance, extremely limited resources, narrow flight operations envelope. Go with multiple drones; they break, you launch another one; it hits a wire or street light and crashes, you launch another one; poor weather, who cares, launch a drone.
they can call harry the hat holmes to train everybody.
I heard about a former military combat veteran helicopter pilot who was Honorably discharged and applied for the CPD helo pilot job. He never got a call back...
I now believe the stories about the Navy SEAL and the Park District ex lifeguard who didn't qualify for the dive team and the former military K-9 handler who couldn't make the K-9 team. I imagine that if any Secret Service members came on they wouldn't be able to make the mayor's details. And an ATF agent wouldnt make the Narcotics team by a longshot. We are sooooo screwed up.
I clinch my teeth every time I hear about CPD only accepting the finest...this is after they lowered the standards at least twice...
Chicago values...
Blogger Tombstone courage said...
What did the current helicopter ever achieve?
4/13/2024 07:18:00 AM
You're kidding, right?
Anonymous said...
What about males traveling in pairs?
4/13/2024 08:33:00 AM
Ooooooooh tell me more!!!
Too bad Daley The Second eliminated Meigs Field. This would have been ideal for CPD Helicopter Operations.
Will the pilots be chosen by merit too?
Anonymous Anonymous said...
I say this as a former army attack helicopter pilot. Ditch the helicopters, to expensive, to much maintenance, extremely limited resources, narrow flight operations envelope. Go with multiple drones; they break, you launch another one; it hits a wire or street light and crashes, you launch another one; poor weather, who cares, launch a drone.
4/13/2024 01:57:00 PM
One hundred percent true. Unfortunately in Illinois our general assembly has put strict restrictions on the use of drones for law enforcement usage.
More bullshit from the Democrats. Flying over watch on the south and west sides. The rats won't like it. What is the production value on the three helo's in constant disrepairs? Another new scam for show and tell. The gullible public and the low information journalists will love it.
Can SWAT rappell from the new Helicopter?
This is a “ Must Have”, Mission- Critical Operational Requirement!
Familiar with the beasts. 5000 parts flying in close formation. Every hour of flight 10 hours of expensive, tedious maintenance. Highest general aviation crash rate. I believe what a couple said, million dollar Uber for the lords of the dnc so they don't get beaten by their supporters . Stay away from helicopters, get a few of George Jetsons flying cars, much safer.
AH-64? Bell AH-1Z Viper?
Stay away from helicopters, get a few of George Jetsons flying cars, much safer.
4/14/2024 03:22:00 AM
Not even that one seater from The Road Warrior?
Anonymous Anonymous said...
Can SWAT rappell from the new Helicopter?
This is a “ Must Have”, Mission- Critical Operational Requirement!
4/14/2024 02:15:00 AM
HUT!....HUT!...HUT!....HUT!.....
they can call harry the hat holmes to train everybody.
4/13/2024 02:50:00 PM
Wrong Harry. The chopper jockey was Captain Harry "Splash" Hohms.
The "Splash" nickname was not associated with a helicopter.
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