Tuesday, August 09, 2005


In the comments section, someone has posted that the Detective results are arriving in the mail. Can anyone else confirm? Look for at least one lawsuit based on the infamous study group at 35th St.

UPDATE: We guess it's true that results are arriving based on all of the comments. Questions now arise as to how far down the list they will go. As most veterans know, it varies. One year, a lawsuit killed the list after SINGLE class of about 80 or 90 guys. Someone here can tell the story we're sure. We do have a hint of a rumor on how you make it into the top spot in the Detective Division though: Just make sure you buy your out of state vacation house right next to or up the block from the next Superintendent's out of state vacation house, and before you know it, BANG! You are the boss of detectives. Amazing how that works, eh? We don't think Mr. Shakman can work any magic on that one though.


Anonymous Homeskool said...


THEY'RE H-E-E-E-R-R-R-E-! ! !


I'm WAYYYYY out of the running though!!! ;-(

8/09/2005 03:08:00 PM  
Blogger Bad Lieutenant said...

do you think if i scored in the top 900 i will make it? i guess i am going to have to stick to being the bad lieutenant...too bad i'm only getting 9161 pay for it.

8/09/2005 03:28:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How many detectives will they make off the list.

8/09/2005 03:33:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Lefty, how did you do on the test?

8/09/2005 03:53:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i heard that if you are in teh top 400 you should eventually make it...that is after the meritorious dicks are made

8/09/2005 03:53:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not true about 400. It was May of 2000 when the last results were mailed. They never even made it 350 on the list. If you are new to the job and have been working your ass off, well don't even think about a mangement (Merit got nuttin to do with it)spot. You are going to become violently ill when you find out who gets those spots.

8/09/2005 04:58:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The last guy's facts are wrong. The last person to get promoted from the old dick's list was right around number 550. If the FOP hadn't sued the city, and the dick's test would have been in 2003 as planned, the promotional list would have probably only gotten to 450 or so.

8/09/2005 05:30:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Question, is it true F.O.P. Donahue and Fallon are going after the "It's Our Union guys" who ran against F.O.P. I heard Fallon was mad about how well I.O.U. came. Any Truth?

8/09/2005 06:42:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

going after them how? burning down their hoouses?

8/09/2005 08:12:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I heard They are currently throwing two union members out of the union and are going after 10 more guys on the I.O.U. team. I thought the election was over!

8/09/2005 11:57:00 PM  
Anonymous Garda said...

Ussually if your in the top one fifty you will get promoted. The first seventy have a good chance than the department will get either 20 or 30 merit spots.

When I made we had twenty percent merit, but classes of one fifty. The list was up for four years and I just made it in with a rank score of 219, because of the merit bs.

Its very demoralizing, and our no balls union or personell will not post an eligibility list for public viewing. We got promoted on a Friday, the city still added twelve guys latter that day or weekend. There response was people had turned down the job. I BET. All the added people were from do nothing gloriuos units. NOT PATROL.

Hang in there, the detective division is the only good place left to work, and we are getting screwed up by these patronage hacks up Phat PHils ass who are becoming our sgts and Lts. with no dick experience.

8/10/2005 12:55:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I made it in the summer of 2003, there were over one hundred in our class. There were also political appointees from the CCSP, including an alderman's son (NOT TOO BRIGHT) and some investigators from the ASA's office.

The worst part was waiting an extra 2 years because I passed up the "YOUTH" job because I had no desire to process juveniles and handle domestics only to have the rules change and now EVERYONE is a detective.

My number was 260 and the waiting really is the worst part, but it is really worth it.

Congrats to all that even took the FULL exam and don't get down when you hear stories about merit suckups that are sitting next to you that didn't bother to show up for the 2nd half because "they Knew" they were going to make it.

8/10/2005 01:43:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Garda!
Why don't you run for a union spot? I bet you don't even attend the meetings. Like retired Sgt. Northern I think you are, perhaps, a rabble rouser.

8/10/2005 07:48:00 AM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

You are entitled to your opinion, "anonymous". However, how dare you term me a "rabble rouser" when I merely speak the TRUTH. How dare you!!!

Do I detect the remnants of a glazed doughnut on your chin?

What do you think, Garda? Hand him/her some Kleenex.

8/10/2005 08:05:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Listen Sgt. N., I'd take you and Garda on at the same time.

No wait.... We can have a tag team wrestling match, best two out of three fall. You two against me and Bush Boy or Leftisthebest.

Or perhaps a bicycle race? You remember the bicycle team, eh sarge?

8/10/2005 11:06:00 AM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

You always were a cerebral guy. I still get your intitials confused with my favorite cup size.

8/10/2005 11:13:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have they finished with the old test?

8/10/2005 12:02:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The old test is done stick a fork in it.

8/10/2005 04:58:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Any rumors on the cheating cunts at 35th street ?

8/10/2005 09:03:00 PM  
Anonymous Garda said...

Hey Anonymous,

Went to seven meetings, backed the independents all the way. Ure right I rock the boat, I have been m/fs by the best of the FOP leaders.

Still waiting for my ten hour day.

8/11/2005 07:48:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let's hear more about the Chief Dick and her love nest.

8/11/2005 08:45:00 AM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

I think you are being very unfair to new Chief of Detectives Maria Soto-Maher. Perhaps she is well qualified to take lead over a thousand plus detectives. Before excoriating someone, we should know about qualifications and past accomplishments. Until recently, I've never even heard of Soto-Maher.

Has she had considerable success at clearing unsolved homicides? Before being promoted to sergeant, did the chief have a prolific record of felony arrests with convictions? Has she been a mentor to now outstanding detectives?

I do know that she is the titular head of many outstanding detectives. Give Chief Soto-Maher and her supporters the opportunity to explain.

Of course, if they're are no explanations forthcoming, it will only demoralize the Detective Division in that Chief of Detectives is now a mere sinecure position. If so, God help the CPD!

How about it, Chief?

8/11/2005 09:22:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Old hands in the Detective Division knew that Maher had a vacation home next door to Phil's down Florida way. I've been busy buying all sorts of property where ever I heard a boss had a place in hopes of getting an exempt spot. I'm damn near broke and own property in 5 states, but at least I have a hired truck to help pay for it all along with a d-2a spot for unlimited overtime.

8/11/2005 10:47:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In regards to our new chief of detectives...
I heard when she was Deputy of Area 5
she got knocked on her ass by some perp she tried to bully..commander of 14 had to come to her rescue....guess the perp wasn't impressed by her gold star and bars..any truth to this rumor??

8/11/2005 10:49:00 AM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

Shortly (9:50 AM CDT) after my last post above, I sent the Chief of Detectives (maria.maher@chicagopolice.org) an eMail entitled "Heads Up, Chief!" to alert her to my 9:22 AM comment. I will post her reply.

Let's be fair with the CPD command staff. No reply at this time.

8/11/2005 12:23:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hope, once again, you were not foolish enough to have done something like letting a boss know about this site. Like that other poster, I think you are a rable rouser. I think maybe you are trying to get this site taken down. First it was Shakman, now it is Chief of Dets. What's next? The mayor?

If this was retired sergeant Northern who did this then you are an idiot. Why don't you just collect your monthly pension check in your high rise abode and let some working police let off some steam. I bet when you were on the job you were a snitch...always running into the commander's officer to let him know what's going on.

8/11/2005 12:37:00 PM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

Au contraire, Mr./Ms. "Anonymous". Anybody that knows me knows that your post is patently preposterous.

I have no doubt that the Mayor's aides monitor this sight. You'd probably be surprised at several groups/individuals that are aware of these postings. So what?

First Amendment rights???

Have another "glazed doughnut", asshole.

8/11/2005 01:40:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey! old dude,
When folks first started to attack you here I thought, look he did his time, give him some respect. Now all I can see is you are a blooming idiot.

Why bring trouble to us? Yea, there are probably snitches that tell bosses about this site, but why should you bring them here?

Those groups and individuals that you say come here? How many of them were brought here by you? Be honest now.

Think about it...you are just causing trouble for officers. Don't be a snitch, man, and confine your comments here and not with outsiders.

8/11/2005 03:41:00 PM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

This "old dude" would like to thank you for sharing your transparent thoughts. It's obvious to all readers that you are a mere patrol officer rolling on "in-progress" jobs in a fast district.

I rather enjoy the novelty of being referred to as a "blooming idiot" and a "snitch". There's always a first time.

Have another "glazed doughnut" while you're at it, Mr./Ms. Anonymous.

8/11/2005 04:26:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey old dude!

You did not answer my questions. What other bosses have you told about this site? Were you a snitch in your last unit? Answer the questions, but please, take your Geritol first.

P.S. I prefer a cinnamon donut please.

8/11/2005 05:09:00 PM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

This "old dude" is younger than your mayor, the Beatles and Mick Jagger.

Unless you engage in rational discourse, I see no point in continuing a pissing contest with coward(s) that refuses to disclose his/her/their identity.

Even you must agree that the "anonymous" lacks credibility. This is the SOLE reason I actually identify myself--CREDIBILITY!

Sorry, I'll let you roll on that "man with a shotgun" run.
Man, you're really humpin' tonight.
Be careful out there.

8/11/2005 05:44:00 PM  
Anonymous Word O' the Day said...

sinecure |ˈsīnəˌkyoŏr; ˈsi-| noun a position requiring little or no work but giving the holder status or financial benefit.

DERIVATIVES sinecurism |ˈsīnəkyoŏrizəm; si-| noun sinecurist |ˈsīnəˌkyoŏrist; si-| noun ORIGIN mid 17th cent.: from Latin sine cura ‘without care.’

8/11/2005 07:47:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I scored #4 on the test!

P.O. Shenika Martin-Hillard-Meeks-Cline

8/11/2005 08:11:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

lmao. That is hysterical.

8/11/2005 08:59:00 PM  
Anonymous Mike Hoare said...

Hey Garda is that you? Sure it is, go ahead with your games Wayne. Tell the readers how much of THIER money YOU wasted on suing the union?

8/11/2005 09:23:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tsk.. Tsk...mere patrol officer?? Shame on you...
Why is he/she a mere patrol officr??

8/12/2005 08:49:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I scored #1 on the test tawilla Meeks-Jackson-Cline

8/12/2005 08:52:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are right about Northern. Big words, but don't ever disagree. You are merely just a patrolman and don't ever forget that. Hey Sergeant, I never took a pinch on this job.

How about a jelly donout?

8/12/2005 09:17:00 AM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

Have you ever heard of "SARCASM"?

For your information, my admiration and respect abounds for the "MERE patrol officers". The blue shirts in the trenches are the heart and soul of our profession. Don't you ever forget it. When will they be accorded the respect and advancement opportunities they so deserve?

Could you be specific about "a pinch"? You've got me chompin' at the bit. Innuendo just doesn't cut it.

As an "anonymous" boss, your efforts to distort the TRUTH are transparent. You are pathetic.

8/12/2005 09:57:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please, make my month. What's this about "a pinch"?

Obviously, you've struck a raw nerve.

I'll always regret that I came up short on my career goal of 1,500 FELONY "pinches". And then as the lead detective, I will always be haunted by the two homicides that we were never able to clear.

You really know how to hurt a guy, asshole...I mean "boss".

I'm waiting...

8/12/2005 10:56:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think that he was talking about you being arrested. That is what you said happened to you in one of your previous posts.

8/12/2005 01:36:00 PM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

Oh, yeah. That's the time when LeRoy Martin and Raymond Risley sent out their KGB IAD "aces" named Jerry Robinson, Louis Velez, at al., to lock me up on a preposterous misdemeanor charge in retaliation for exercising my First Amendment rights to free speech concerning "ExamScam". I had to help them do the paperwork on MY arrest and to secure a loaded revolver on a table within my reach.

The case was promptly thrown out, my "record" expunged and no less than Chief Judge Richard A. Posner of the Seventh Circuit Court of Appeals wrote that the IAD debacle was "cockeyed".

Thanks to the above-cited miserable excuses for "police officers", the City of Chicago was forced to settle my First Amendment case.

Now, aren't you delighted you opened the door on that debacle, anonymous "bosses".

I'm exercising my First Amendments rights now in that the clout-infested CPD is a terminal case of political corruption.

Care to try again, assholes?

8/12/2005 03:22:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aaah, a while day and no one has attacked Sgt. Northern. Then again, he hasn't ratted us to anyone today......yet

8/12/2005 05:19:00 PM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

"Ratted us"??? Kindly clarify
what the fuck you are talking about.

8/12/2005 05:56:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I mean old dude,
your going OUTSIDE this group to tell some boss (Maher) or lawyer (Shakman) about this site. I said it the other day and I'll say it again, you're a blooming idiot. You must have fell off your bicycle years ago on the bike patrol and hit your head.

Like some other guy wrote, you are a rable rouser who is trying to break up this site so you can have a good laugh at the expense of working police. Get a life.

8/13/2005 09:54:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The chief of dicks also baby sits the fat guys grand children.

I need some property there

8/13/2005 10:10:00 AM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

"Anonymous" boss(es) from 9:54 A.M.

So you must be "the working police", eh? If so, the likes of Michael L. Shakman may prove helpful to thousands of outstanding cloutless "working police"...unless you're just another incompetent, politically-connected "boss" with his/her tongue deeply implanted in some politician's colon.

Are you just a garden variety psychopath or paranoid schizophrenic, "boss(es)"?

I ALWAYS worked the street. However, I never had a bicycle assignment.

Wanna talk more about "pinches", sleazebag.

s/the "blooming idiot"

P.S.: Readers. Let's see how low he/she/they can go in his/her/their next ad hominem attack. If this piece of feces is "working police", I'm Bud Billiken.

8/13/2005 11:29:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am working police and I just saw you on the parade.You looked good, blooming idiot, snitchbag

8/13/2005 11:35:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am working police and I just saw you on the parade.You looked good, blooming idiot, snitchbag

8/13/2005 11:35:00 AM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

So much for rational discourse.

Your "rebuttal" was so NICE, you said it TWICE.

If you are the "working police", kindly explain why you are "SHAKMANophobic", SuperCop(s)

Take your meds, "boss(es)"

s/"blooming idiot, snitchbag"

8/13/2005 11:50:00 AM  
Anonymous "blooming idiot" said...

Speaking of "blooming idiots", check out the following concerning Intelligence Quotient (IQ) scores, "boss(es)".

IQ of 90-110 = median or average intelligence; 81-90 = dull; 70-80 = borderline deficiency; 50-69 = moron; 20-49 = imbecile, below 20 = IDIOT.

On my last Stanford-Binet and Wechsler, I managed to score in three digits. How about you, "boss(es)". Are you MENSA material?


8/13/2005 12:25:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No, you're a retard if you're bragging about you're IQ.

8/13/2005 03:12:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If the sarge "managed to score in three digits", that could be as low as IQ 100 which is average.

8/13/2005 03:45:00 PM  
Anonymous John Northen said...

Thank you, last poster.

Since my "pro-clout" antagonist(s) incessantly insists that I'm a (blooming) "idiot", I merely want to assure him/her that my I.Q. is at least eighty points (average) above the clinical definition of an idiot (I.Q.>21).

While this European-American objects to his/her callous use of the word "retard" rather than the politically correct "intellectually challenged", I agree that any pompous asshole that goes around bragging about a high I.Q. score is an insecure and obnoxious boor. Aside from the FACT that I am NOT a member of Mensa, my I.Q. is irrelevant and nobody's business.

8/13/2005 05:22:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was going to reply to leftisthebest comments on the death penalty, but decided to again check on the comments of our pal, Sgt. "Snitchbag" Northern, aka "Blooming Idiot."

Why even get into an IQ discussion? You colored outside the lines anyway.

No comments from your new buddies Shakman or the Chief of Dets. on this site, after you notified them about this site. Or maybe you have just sent them copies of the comments here?

Let's hear about your pinches, old dude. The arrests of drunk, passed out homeless don't count. I've never been politically connected, but you had "friends" I bet.

Tell the folks at the AARP meeting I said hello.

8/14/2005 12:58:00 AM  
Anonymous John Northen said...


Have a happy life, ANONYMOUS "boss(es)".

8/14/2005 07:24:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey old dude!!!

I was thinkin'. Maybe the day after they name the new Chief of Patrol you could e-mail him (her) and let them know about this site. It'll save ya the time later on when ya spring it on the board here.

P/S Walgreen's called....the extra strength Geritol you requested has arrived!

8/14/2005 04:18:00 PM  

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