This is "Reporting"

The Tribune must be really stretching to fill their pages:

• South Side rapper Chief Keef was arrested near Atlanta this week for disorderly conduct after hotel security smelled marijuana smoke coming from his room, police said.
  
  The disorderly conduct arrest comes two months after he was released from custody in Chicago for a probation violation.

So is this another violation? And seriously, who cares?

• An afternoon test drive of a Dodge Charger turned into a joyride Monday when a teenager from Humboldt Park sped off in the car, with a reluctant dealership employee riding shot-gun.
  
  Kendall Jackson, 18, of the 4800 block of West Superior Street, was charged with posession of a stolen vehicle, unlawful restraint of a person, and driving without a license after he visited the World Discount Auto, Inc. dealership on North Cicero Avenue on Monday afternoon.
  
  Jackson drove the car far past the boundaries of the dealership during the test, according to the police report, while a 31-year-old dealership employee in the passenger's seat pled with him to turn the car around.

And this 18-year-old with no license (and probably an entry level job or less) was allowed to test drive a piece of equipment costing tens of thousands of dollars why exactly? The car dealer/salesman ought to face charges of Felony Stupidity. This happens all the time, yet no one seems to learn.

• When Chicago police officers observed a car double-parked on the 1400 block of North Keeler Avenue in Humboldt Park Thursday, they decided to talk to the driver.
  
  But the driver, Francisco Cruz, of Belmont Gardens, couldn't speak, the police report said. He mumbled something when officers asked for his drivers license, which he did not have, but they couldn't understand him. And when officers asked him if he had something in his mouth, his response was still too garbled to understand.
  
  "Spit it out," officers said to Cruz, 41, according to the report, shining a flashlight into his mouth. Instead, he allegedly lunged at the officers, flailing his arms in an attempt to flee. Unable to escape, he pulled three plastic bags from his mouth and uttered his first words since the police arrived.

Again, this happens on a daily basis, but the Tribune deems it newsworthy for some reason. All of this ought to be on a crime blotter somewhere, not taking up pages while Rahm drives this city into the ground and helps connected people steal everything that isn't nailed down.