Tuesday, June 30, 2020

Send in SWAT

It's coming:

Sooner than you think.



Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bwahahahahah....I think I peed a little.

6/30/2020 12:07:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please, please.

Make sure they also get body cameras. They will be helpful in solving the assaults, robberies, rapes, and murders.

6/30/2020 12:13:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What you mean coming soon? That’s exactly what our SWAT does now. OUCH! Blow me Charlie.

6/30/2020 12:17:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Make sure the vehicles used for this are painted pink instead of the blue. They also need pink lights instead of blue. That way the neighborhoods will welcome them with open arms. Perhaps soccer mom minivans would be less scary too..

6/30/2020 12:23:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Give them Auto-Injectors loaded the Thorazine and/or Ketamine?

They are going to need it.

6/30/2020 12:29:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Chicago Annual Circus is on. With a completely new program. Very entertaining. I can't wait.

6/30/2020 12:33:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Better get ready to redistribute funds.... how come no one has talked about opening up the mental facilities as a part of addressing the issues of people— is some politician getting an off shore account ready; and does anyone have any faith the FBI would even stop it

6/30/2020 12:48:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

CIT whisperers unit.

6/30/2020 12:51:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

We all know you can’t send in Kim Foxx and the politician judges in cook county. They let everyone off easy.

6/30/2020 12:56:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hope the real Chicago SWAT Team gets some real training and practice on negotiations and hostage rescue.

If you ever actually deploy these alternative resolution response teams, they will get lots of exercise.

6/30/2020 01:00:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Concerned Citizen here

Here are some ideas to add some cash to the chaplains’ fund.

Members of SWAT will donate $100 to the chaplains’ fund as an act of contrition for each and every post deriding the police found on their social media accounts.

On Monday of every week each of these social justice knob-jobs will donate one day’s pay to the chaplains’ fund. This will ensure a prompt and forceful police response when they call for help to save their asses. Failure of any member of SWAT (social workers and therapists) to make this donation will result in the response of No Units Available to any and all calls for help from any and all members of SWAT.

‘The Chicago Way’ it can work for you.

6/30/2020 01:25:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait. The cops are on "your side"? WTF do we need Black Lies Matter for then??

"You don't want 600 people to come here and destroy your business and burn it down. The cops are on our side," according to the complaint, which included interviews with the bar owner about what Johnson allegedly said. "You notice that when you call them, nothing happens to us."



6/30/2020 01:47:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


... and we can send "trained crisis de-escalation responders" to calls like this -

Man who sleeps NAKED in drained fountain of NYC's Washington Square Park is removed for the second time in three days


6/30/2020 02:28:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

SCC Moderator, you're very clever.

S.W.A.T. will work, until social workers and therapists become victims of crime. ☹️

6/30/2020 03:33:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Make sure the vehicles used for this are painted pink instead of the blue. They also need pink lights instead of blue. That way the neighborhoods will welcome them with open arms. Perhaps soccer mom minivans would be less scary too..

6/30/2020 12:23:00 AM


And the siren should play calliope music, or alternatively a soothing melody like, "Send in the Clowns, there's got to be Clowns,,,"

6/30/2020 05:45:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Watch for a whole cottage industry for social workers
and therapists needing help/testimonials to secure
disability benefits. Therapy dogs, massage therapists,
finger painting tutorials, Kum-Bye-Yah Camps, guitar
lessons, pottery groups. Help getting the Medical Marijuana
Card. You Pay Nothing Unless We Get Disability For You.

6/30/2020 06:16:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Look for Dart to make a buck on this trend.
We're top heavy with social workers.
Kids from relatiely well to do families who just had
a goal to "help people," not make a life for themselves
and pay the rent. Young, naive, idealistic dummies.

6/30/2020 06:21:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ask the family of the late Tony Timpa (Dallas) about
social workers. He called 911 after a panic attack
supposedly resulting from going off his psych meds.
He just might be alive today.
Tony Timpa is David Brown's George Floyd.

6/30/2020 06:26:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Groot is going to make them constables, "unarmed" they'll be like glorified block captains because they know everybody in the community just like the constables on the Indian reservations and in Alaska for the tribes.... They want the money so that they can do patrols and they want the authority to make decisions on who gets the police called on them and who doesn't...tribal Justice

6/30/2020 06:34:00 AM  
Anonymous Said reality said...

Oh great, give them a tough name like SWAT🤣 that'll go straight to their head! Watch as they walk into their first job or two, chest all pumped out as the SJW saviour they are until reality strikes by way of dude inc. and the beating/robbery/and very possible sexual assault ensues.

But yes SSC, where's all the funding to reinstate all the cuts 9.5 made to mental health

6/30/2020 06:38:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can anyone guess how long it will take for one of these goofs to respond to the scene.I cant go ,the projects are scary and I live too far.

6/30/2020 07:19:00 AM  
Anonymous Old Guy said...

Great fun SCC, 😂 LMAOROTF

6/30/2020 07:53:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So do we see any move to put 1,200 social workers on the streets this weekend?

6/30/2020 08:04:00 AM  
Blogger The Keesing Bandit said...

It's a pretty logo. I like pretty logos.

Now, kees me you fool!!!!

6/30/2020 08:04:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

June 30, 2020
Cops go Galt in the wake of the current chaos
By Monica Showalter

In the wake of the George Floyd riots, police are being demonized across the country, each and every officer now being held responsible for the action of its least-worthy members.

They're also being targeted for 'defunding' as if any society on earth could exist without some measure of policing without turning into Lord of the Flies.

It's getting little coverage, but the stories are dribbling out in rapidly about a collective call for help: Some 272 New York police officers retired in the wake of George Floyd riots, a 49% spike over the year earlier. Seattle was similar - its forces are operating at just 65% capacity. Minneapolis has seen at least seven resignations. Joel Pollak, at Breitbart News has an astonishing report about police demoralization in Los Angeles:

It's bad, and it portends some bad times as police jobs are abandoned, and early retirements spike upward.

“The citizens think crime and homelessness is bad now? They have seen nothing yet,” the LAPD source told Breitbart News. “Wait till a couple of months go by. Pro-activity is all but gone. It sucks. But the community has allowed cops to be vilified.

“When there is blood in the streets, due to a drastic increase of out-of-control violent crime? Then all the people, including businesses who have turned their backs on cops, will learn of the mistake they made on selling us out!


6/30/2020 08:45:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Simply another layer of govt jobs to go out. There will be more crisis counselors on hand to go early on calls but you can bet they aren't going unless the police go with. Look for a couple of 3 person cars per shift with the 3rd being a counselor.

6/30/2020 09:08:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks.....I needed a good laugh today.......
What a joke.....except it isn’t......

6/30/2020 09:13:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That’s where the Defund OT is going.
To pay community interrupters and create dozens of local SWAT programs.
Jam’oil Greened will be one of many executive directors.
Didn’t the LightLoafers just announce a $10 million grant to establish hospitality programs for the S-W community ?

Still, the calls will come in “...meet the SWAT at xxxx S. xxxx St. for a disturbance with altered state.
Officer do your job, i was disrespected and want to press charges and want this mfer arrested and I’m calling a white shirt.

6/30/2020 10:21:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Call them what you want in Saudi Arabia they bring them with machetes.

6/30/2020 10:24:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Prediction here.... extremely HIGH turnover.

6/30/2020 10:33:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You crazy right wingers and your conspiracy theories! Don't you know violent crime is solely caused by the teachers' union being underfunded and due to criminals not being given hugs and participation trophies?

Prison is not place for violent, convicted criminals! Not ever!

Vote by mail for Biden 2020!

6/30/2020 10:53:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And I’m sure it will be governed by no less than a deputy chief with a take home minivan. And what will the qualifications be for the secretary spot?

6/30/2020 10:53:00 AM  
Blogger CFD brother said...

(Fade in on aerial view of Chicago at night)
(Appears in bold letters)
SWAT – True Action Tales From the City
Episode 8 – An Unwelcome Guest

Dr. Constance P Trustworthy, Social Worker, Asst. Deputy for Sanitation, Cook County Hosp.
Amir Mahbutu El Camino, Community Organizer, TWO, 5th ward Democratic organization
M. Amnezia Jones-Robinson, Crisis Intervention Counsellor, Chicago Park District
Dr. J Edgar Uppity-Clambake, Psychology Dept. Chair, Univ of Chicago

Fade in to dispatcher at console) “911, what’ your emergency?”
Caller (Female voice): “Dis gotdam mufuckah won’t get out mah howse”
Call taker: “I will transfer you to 311 ma’am, please call that number for non-emergancies”
Caller: “Hunh?”
Call taker: “ … here you go.”

Cut to the interior of a pink Prius where our cast sits outside Starbucks waiting for the next call))
Ding!! – A text to the team – 1212 Kedvale – woman reports uninvited guest in her home.
Fade out, Fade in to night view of a west side block, camera pans while moving to focus on small home.

Cut to pink Prius arriving “on scene”, emergency flashers (tinted pink) are “lit-up”. Doctor Trustworthy, the team leader sends an instagram to OEM signaling the team’s arrival on the scene.

Woman on Dry rotted, dilapidated porch. “Hey .. hey, over heah y’all!! Hurry! If I was white y’all woulda been heah faster!! Whutch’all gone do bout dis ignunt fool up in my howse?
Good evening ma’am, we are the social services team here to help solve your dilemma and assuage your fear”, says Doc.
“d’fuck y’all talkiin bout, swajin’ and da,lemon?” Yelps the caller, ”where da Poe-leee?”
We are here instead of the CPD so that you will be treated fairly and unambivalently”, says the Doc, “we can resolve your issue with poise and grace so that all parties can come to an amicable solution”.
‘Nah what de FUCK is this shit?! Jus’ amicubull that muhfuckah’ ignunt ass outta mah howse rat naw!
Amir steps up to the caller. “Ma’am, my name is Amir, and as a black man I can understand your trepidation and angst. “ May I ask of your relationship with this man?”
“Mah WHAT?? Say you Urkle lookin’ muthafuckah, y’all better watch yo mouf, direpectin’ mah diginty like dat. Get him da FUCK out mah howse NAW!!!”
Dr. Uppity Clambake: “Ma’am please settle down, there isI no need to escalate emotions”
“’Motions!!!???”, Fuck you Richie Cunningham, get dat ignnunt, free-loadin’, weed smokin’, 40 drinkin’, asshole out mah howse naw, bitch!”
A crowd begins gathering and comments start up about the ”fine lookin’s sistuh wif the clipbored” Within a few mninutes the crowd get restless and begis to get loud, shouting “DO SOMETHIN’”!!!
The discussion continues on the front porch, the affected lady caller gets increasingly louder, demanding that the man in her howse be “put out”.
One of the youngsters in the crowd starts to voice his opinion that the team is actually the PoPo’s. The crowd begins to press closer to the porch and taunts and shouts of “Pigs” and “I cain’t hardly breave” fill the night.
Dr. Trustworthy: “Um, I think it bet that we discreetly ease back to the Prius for our safety, team”
The team picks its way through the ever intensifying angry crowd, sustaining more than just hurt feelings. Dr. Trustworthy’s cell phone and clipboard have been stolen. Ms.Jones Robinson’s been pawed at and has a run in her hosiery. A plastic bottle has hit Dr. Clambake as well as Amir El-Camino. Dr. Trustworthy has stepped in two piles of dogshit and is loathe to enter the Prius with the excrement so she leaves her shoe in the street, causing her to cut her foot on broken glass. They fire up the pink Prius just in time because the darn kids are now trying to break the glass.

As the team speeds toward Roosevelt Rd., Dr. Clambake exclaims, “Fuck this shit – call the police!”
(Fade out as the Pink Prius heads east towards Chicago loop.)

6/30/2020 11:13:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Make sure the vehicles used for this are painted pink instead of the blue. They also need pink lights instead of blue. That way the neighborhoods will welcome them with open arms. Perhaps soccer mom minivans would be less scary too..

6/30/2020 12:23:00 AM

Perhaps a vehicle resembling an ice cream truck would work better this summer. Sure to turn that frown upside down. Ice cream onboard, happy faces, lots of rainbow lights and flags (Groot insists). At least one of the specially trained must play an instrument and carry it with them and also be an aspiring rapper. If they refuse to communicate, rap the questions to the person in need. No guns allowed signs posted so the folks aren't scared of the new SWAT team. The team must consist of one black, one brown, one blonde. A new woke Mod Squad.

6/30/2020 11:20:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

here is a new acronym : FIDO. Eff it, drive on.

6/30/2020 11:22:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait until these "social workers and therapists" get roughed up during domestics and they start filing lawsuits with OSHA....

6/30/2020 11:22:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think thes judges should be required to ride patrol a couple of shifts per month.

6/30/2020 01:11:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

CPS is short 80 social workers so CTU took its members out to the streets for jack....CPS can't attract nor retain social workers for obvious reasons.....the money is there for the positions but SW are no where to be found...

6/30/2020 01:53:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Might want to keep an “extraction team” on standby to get the social workers out of tight situations.

I’d suggest four people wearing haz-mat suits, rubber boots and gloves. They’ll need a good supply of body bags, lots of disinfectant, and a mop.

They tried this in Portland several years ago and it lasted less than a month before the social workers were so scared they insisted on a police escort for all calls.

6/30/2020 02:34:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmmm, are they competing against my chance for a big ass’d gubmint grant with my program....SAY’WAT ?

6/30/2020 02:49:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No family structure, mother's without father's. Children from broken homes.

6/30/2020 05:00:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

By the time the police are called, many (most?) of our "clients" (not talking violent criminals here) are too far gone for any meaningful, "touchy-feely" help.

These are social problems that a police officer gets maybe 10-20 minutes to resolve something that took years to develop. Then it's off to the next stacked job.

To think that something like this "SWAT team" will make a difference with things as they are is a fallacy. They won't be able to undo the damage that resulted in them being called in the first place, either. Particularly in the 10-20 minutes they too will have to defuse the situation.

This kind of SWAT needs to be applied long before someone dials 9-1-1. Better yet, how about increased family interaction & responsibility prior to these problems rearing their head? It shouldn't "take a village" most of the time.

Getting the police out of the "social welfare" business is a good idea. It will show how inadequate the resources for handling these problems truly are. This kind of thing has been dumped in the lap of law enforcement because we're the only ones who will answer the phone after 5:00 p.m. & on weekends, let alone actually send someone out. Unfortunately police haven't been provided the resources to adequately deal with these problems, and yet, get sent to deal with them every day. And we do deal with them. Most of the time things turn out okay, and so they continue to send police. But our solutions are temporary.

In the absence of these resources, "SWAT" will be another bandage solution to an arterial bleed. The resources to handle these chronic problems don't seem to exist.


6/30/2020 05:20:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

11:13 AM
CFD Brother
Bravo! Who knew Fire had Literary Giants?
That's a fucking screen play, my man.
And you wrote it on company time!
That's the best revenge. Living well.

6/30/2020 05:56:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"They tried this in Portland several years ago and it lasted less than a month before the social workers were so scared they insisted on a police escort for all calls."

6/30/2020 02:34:00 PM

Seattle police chief is making small noises about cleaning out the so-called "autonomous zone," at least two (black) killed in there and 300 rounds fired last night, "security" has AKs.

Streets guys in there today, front-end loader clearing barricades and junk, but it looked like no police presence at all to cover them and the bums are just dragging the junk back...

Residents and businessmen there filed federal lawsuit, city doesn't care. Seattle has the most virulent leftist city council you ever saw, crazier than the ones here, real hard-core shouting Communists who hate the world...

6/30/2020 06:13:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Couple of years ago, one town really did have the coppers handing out ice cream bars in the summer.

Now BLMAntifa has erased the Eskimo Pie because of "racism."

Oh, well.

6/30/2020 06:27:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They will get called and refuse to go until the police go in 1st to make sure they are really needed. Or they will request to have police go with them. I can see them all lining up to overnights and holidays. How about the1st nice weekend. So who will people call if all social workers are off

6/30/2020 06:37:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Make sure the vehicles used for this are painted pink instead of the blue. They also need pink lights instead of blue. That way the neighborhoods will welcome them with open arms. Perhaps soccer mom minivans would be less scary too.."

6/30/2020 12:23:00 AM

"Perhaps a vehicle resembling an ice cream truck would work better this summer. Sure to turn that frown upside down. Ice cream onboard, happy faces, lots of rainbow lights and flags (Groot insists)."

6/30/2020 11:20:00 AM

The NKVD, (predecessor to the KGB) was known to have
used cookie company trucks with which to snatch the
unwary off the streets...

It's all a laugh until a Keebler truck slows to match your
walking pace when suddenly a half dozen REALLY BIG M/FERS
heavy-laden with government issue iron and wearing heavy
overcoats gently persuade you with a "controlled fall"
into the back of the truck.

"Greetings comrade!"

"Heyyyyy... EEK!"
>Poot!< "MOMMY!"

>Door-Slam... Cookie Truck rolls
along like nothin' happened<

What m/fin' witnesses?

"Fukyawl! We ain't seen SHIT!"

6/30/2020 07:16:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Prediction here.... extremely HIGH turnover.


Yeah and reverse seniority.

6/30/2020 07:20:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought that's what Foxx and Evans did now.

6/30/2020 07:25:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So how do you lose a city and country? Gradually and then suddenly.

6/30/2020 10:47:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Almost as brilliant as light foot sending uber drivers to COVID related domestic situations.. without their knowledge of it being a domestic situation. Like you are equipped to stop it as an Uber driver and are willing to possibly die for it. Sure police know how intense domestic situations are and did not sign up for the extra tension communism orders caused

7/01/2020 01:50:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

11:13:00 AM.........Now THAT is some funny shit.

7/01/2020 08:09:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Haha, let them do it. Let the liberal thug huggers fill these positions, that way they will get a taste of reality. When they get beaten, robbed, raped, shot or murdered maybe they will wake up. But probably not.

7/01/2020 11:02:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hugs for Thugs! ( Recommend the Keesing Bandit for this duty! )

7/01/2020 12:23:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

@ 6/30/2020 11:13:00 AM...


Them shits was funny.

Nothing like a funky-assed
westcide fairytail well told.


7/01/2020 05:33:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

here is a new acronym : FIDO. Eff it, drive on.

6/30/2020 11:22:00 AM

Where you been hiding
for the last 40+ years?

7/01/2020 05:36:00 PM  
Blogger The Keesing Bandit said...

This Lug will never Hug a Thug.I

Now, kees me you fool!!!!

7/02/2020 07:58:00 AM  

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