SCC Plays Carnac

We will now predict an upcoming memo, directive, AdMin FAX, all call message or General Order to be read at all roll calls for the next week or so:

• Fire Hydrant enforcement

After all - it's money in the bank:

• A 4-year-old boy died Sunday afternoon after being struck by an SUV while playing in an open fire hydrant in the Englewood neighborhood.

  The driver of the SUV did not flee the scene, and received two driving citations.

  The child was playing in the 6000 block of South May Street when an SUV struck him about 2:50 p.m., according to Fire Media Affairs Spokesman

The quaint and dangerous neighborhood tradition of tossing a few tires over a fire plug, propping a 2-by-6 against one of the uncapped outlets, finding a monkey wrench and a magnet (or a sledge hammer) have once again resulted in a death. The hell with the property damage to surrounding residences, the lack of water pressure to the rest of the neighborhood in case of a fire, the fine tradition of parental supervision and complete disregard for the law. Anyone think Jesse and Meeks are going to march?

Englewood must be so proud.

UPDATE: Read the Channel 7 article we linked to:

• Mathis admits she is the one who opened the hydrant and gathered all the kids to play in it. Englewood residents say on hot days it's the only option for kids.

  "We've been doing it for years and no child has ever gotten hit," said neighbor Kita Weathers. "Kids have nothing to do. They play in fire hydrant."

So this woman is complicit in an involuntary homicide along with the Criminal Damage to the hydrant. As to the kids having nothing to do, what the hell is Daley spending all our tax money on if he isn't buying votes with parks and pools and day camps and all sorts of crap. Sounds more like the parents are too damn lazy to actually find something for the kids to do.