Saturday, March 19, 2011

Let Him Fry

Literally:
  • Police answering cries for help on Friday found a screaming burglar dangling from a ceiling air vent over a hot fat fryer at an upstate New York restaurant.

    "He said he thought he was going to die," said Lt. Michael Brown, spokesman for the police in Rotterdam, New York.

    A grease-covered Timothy Cipriani, 46, of nearby Schenectady was pleading for help when he was discovered wedged into the ventilation duct at Paesan's Pizza in the early hours of the morning.
Flicking handfuls of water into the grease bins would have added to the entertainment.

We're going to have a weekend of posting some lighter stuff. Nothing too serious unless necessary. Enjoy.

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22 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Poor bastard. Bet he won't do that again.

3/19/2011 01:33:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Probably taste just like chicken.

3/19/2011 01:55:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Opinion Brief

Why is there no looting in Japan?

"A lawless atmosphere often follows natural disasters. How has Japan managed to maintain order in the aftermath of last week's earthquake and tsunami?"

posted on March 15, 2011, at 10:08 AM

"Japanese residents queue up in an orderly fashion outside a 7-Eleven; despite limited access to basic necessities, there has been no widespread looting after the catastrophic Japanese earthquake and tsunami."

"The chaos and theft that have followed many earthquakes, hurricanes and tsunamis have been noticeably absent in the wake of Japan's 8.9-magnitude quake. Instead, people have formed long, orderly lines outside grocery stores, where employees try to fairly distribute limited supplies of food and water.

"Looting simply does not take place in Japan," says Gregory Pflugfelder, an expert in Japanese culture at Columbia University, as quoted by CNN. "I'm not even sure if there's a word for it that is as clear in its implications as when we hear 'looting.'" How has Japan managed to avoid this common after-effect of disaster?"

http://theweek.com/article/
index/213154/why-is-there
-no-looting-in-japan

3/19/2011 02:16:00 AM  
Anonymous PO FOSTER BROOKS said...

(burp) ┬┐┬┐SCHENECTODY??!!!!



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6jNNFqQODKE

3/19/2011 07:05:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Accurate Police Report

*Augusta, GA*
*Orville Smith, a store manager for Best Buy in Augusta, Georgia, told
police he observed a male customer, later identified as Tyrone Jackson
of Augusta, on surveillance cameras putting a laptop computer under
his jacket... When confronted the man became irate, knocked down an
employee, drew a knife and ran for the door.*

*Outside on the sidewalk were four Marines collecting toys for the
"Toys for Tots" program. Smith said the Marines stopped the man, but
he stabbed one of the Marines, Cpl. Phillip Duggan, in the back; the
injury did not appear to be severe.*

*After Police and an ambulance arrived at the scene Cpl. Duggan was
transported for treatment.

The subject was also transported to the local hospital with two broken
arms, a broken ankle, a broken leg, several missing teeth, possible
broken ribs, multiple contusions, assorted lacerations, a broken nose
and a broken jaw...injuries he sustained when he slipped and fell off
of the curb after stabbing the Marine.*

Now that was a well written Police report."

3/19/2011 07:24:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh Maron! Minga! I almost gotta cooked like a frencha fry! Lucky he didn't get cooked, the lame bastard would have sued the retaurant for cooking him!

No Looting in Japan? That's because they have manners. They have problems in Florida with hurricanes and in most places, the citizens act like human beings, not dogs gone wild.

3/19/2011 07:27:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was at one of these in about 1989-90. 119th and western in a chinese restaurant. Old boy tried to wriggle down the exhaust vent, got caught under the rib cage by a support bar and froze to death. His hand were extended above his head. You could just see his bare feets hanging down.

Memories!

3/19/2011 07:42:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Grease is the word.

3/19/2011 08:00:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

http://theweek.com/article/
index/213154/why-is-there
-no-looting-in-japan

3/19/2011 02:16:00 AM

As I have sometimes been told by educators in certain areas of Chicago, "You wouldn't understand. It's a cultural thing."

3/19/2011 08:09:00 AM  
Anonymous An Old Sergeant said...

"Looting simply does not take place in Japan," says Gregory Pflugfelder, an expert in Japanese culture at Columbia University, as quoted by CNN. "I'm not even sure if there's a word for it that is as clear in its implications as when we hear 'looting.'"
============================
I'm no expert on Japanese culture, but I very much doubt if there is a Japanese word for "entitlement" either.

3/19/2011 08:15:00 AM  
Anonymous rosco said...

Watch for the lawsuit which will make him rich.

3/19/2011 08:48:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No basketball teams to speak of either. Coincidence? I think not.

3/19/2011 08:51:00 AM  
Blogger Michael said...

the hawks have 11 games left and take the ice against phoenix sunday at 1900 hrs--- dallas was a bloodbath the other night, one of the worst games of the season punctuated by marty turco looking like he was playing rat hockey somewhere--- vancouver has to be praying for the hawks to slip into the 8 spot so they can take a run at them--- hawks vancouver would be a good first round match up....

3/19/2011 09:44:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i don't hear nothing

3/19/2011 10:42:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks SCC. You work too hard in my opinion. You're the first thing I check in the a.m. Go watch some cartoons!

3/19/2011 02:45:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heavy on the Mumbo sauce, extra fries & a side of 'slaw.

3/19/2011 03:57:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wonder what dipping sauce would have been best?

3/19/2011 04:02:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Got this in email today. Signed by a police officer, whose name I've left off. Gotta be a myth, right?

I just got off of the phone with a 023rd district police officer, who informed me of the following:

Three devices were found in the alley behind the McDonald's Restaurant at Wilson Avenue & Sheridan Road.

One was a dud or intentionally not working. The other two were live and filled with about a gallon of acid, which when the bomb squad detonated them from a safe distance, blew in every direction.

The theory now is that the first one was to lull first responders into a false sense of security so they'd be lackadaisical and careless in defusing the other two.

I'm sending this out and urging you to pass it on as a safety alert
to ALL our first responders. Be careful out there. I want to see you at the pension board.

3/19/2011 06:13:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Had that happen years ago at a dry cleaner in the 17th District.

Fool was upside down in an air conditioning shaft and moaning in Ghettoese.

Scared the heck out of the little Chinese woman who opened the store.

We got there first and suggested turning on the furnace until we could smell the meat cooking.

CFD got there and kept pounding on the sheet metal to see he was alright. Tooo bad this was in the days before cell phone cameras, fool sliding out was like giving birth.

Never heard that he sued.

3/19/2011 07:42:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"The subject was also transported to the local hospital with two broken
arms, a broken ankle, a broken leg, several missing teeth, possible
broken ribs, multiple contusions, assorted lacerations, a broken nose
and a broken jaw...injuries he sustained when he slipped and fell off
of the curb after stabbing the Marine.*

"Now that was a well written Police report."

--3/19/2011 07:24:00 AM

They forgot to mention the globe-and-anchor USMC emblem permanently embossed backwards into the center of the guy's forehead from accidentally contacting a Marine belt buckle that was wrapped around someone's fist...

Bad "lifestyle decision," guy.

3/19/2011 08:20:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Looks like he open a can of
Whoop Ass on himself

Semper Fi.

3/20/2011 10:55:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Looks like he open a can of
Whoop Ass on himself

"Semper Fi."

--3/20/2011 10:55:00 AM

...and he woo woo woo.

I'm dying here...(pfft)

3/20/2011 08:32:00 PM  

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