Holiday Poem
Twas The Night Before Christmas
Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the day
All the clout babies were crying
They had nothing to say
A new boss was coming
And promised a change
Their days were all numbered
They found it quite strange
They’d be forced to work
How dare he’d do that
Put back in the field
This they all must combat
I’ll call in I’m sick
I have nothing to fear
I can milk this for months
Or even a year
To give up my car
How mean and how cruel
Or my 3 hr lunch
It’s against all my rules
I need my computer
I need my blue jeans
I can’t be replaced
Who’ll count all the beans?
The streets are to scary
With crazies and jerks
My gun is all rusty
Patrol has no perks
I’ll be forced to write tickets
I’ll be forced to be there
I can’t do my shopping
Time for a prayer
Holy Mother of details
Please come to my aid
Please save me from police work
I’m scared, and afraid
Help them all see
I was never a cop
I’d rather wash dishes
Or be a bellhop
Thanks to a reader who wrote it and sent it in
Labels: we got nothing
posted by SCC at 12:01 AM
45 Comments:
Name two units in this fine department of ours that have the most clout babies. Units where the contract means nothing and always compromised.
Lietenants list coming out today -
December 7th 2007.
A day of infamy..
If Cline's kid gets made.
Hilarious :) I love it! Seiser approved!
Just imagine sitting in a beat car for 10.5 hours. Can't wait for the 10 hour day, 5 days straight.
Nice Diddy SCC!
Let's get this one going...
On the 1st day of Christmas Richie gave to me...A boss who used to be a G....
Anyone for the 2nd day?.....
Thanks alot! Milk and coco-puffs came through my nose as I was choking from laughing so hard!
Priceless!!!
That's funny stuff, and if I can quote "Blazing Saddles", "oh it's true, it true, it's true"
Anonymous said...
Just imagine sitting in a beat car for 10.5 hours. Can't wait for the 10 hour day, 5 days straight.
12/07/2007 02:14:00 AM
State police do it but 4 on 4 off schedule that could work with 2 4 day weekends in a row!
12/07/2007 12:36:00 AM
intelligence,jttf (what a joke tommy bynes daughter does she work?), daleys detail,burkes detail, treasurers detail, corp counsels (I make my own hours and get new take home cars), oh sorry that is more than 2 how many more?
Off Topic, I just heard on the news that Henry Hyde is being buried today. Was there some reason they kept him on ice for an entire week?
Great post whoever thought it up. I can't wait for Weis to clean house and put some of these prima donnas and cowards on the street.
Anonymous said...
Name two units in this fine department of ours that have the most clout babies. Units where the contract means nothing and always compromised.
12/07/2007 12:36:00 AM
My guess is TRU & Detached Services
On the 2nd day of Christmas King Richie gave to me...Two many missions....and a boss who was once a G..
AWESOME!!! Give that man (woman) a blue ribbon. Excellent! I feel better already.
funny.......and true.....
BRAVO, BRAVO!
Oh, so truthful.
On the second day of Christmas, King Richie gave to me;
Sh-t, he gave us nothing.
I like the one about giving back cars. Start at the Academy. White shirts below the rank of the Director/Commander don't need to take a car home. They wanted a job there knowing it is removed far from the house. Suck it up and drive like the rest of us.
I just love poetry, It is appreicated by the artsy-craftsy crowd that frequent this great blog. Can this be read aloud while sipping my caffe-latee in Starbucks.
Keep up the good work in keeping up educated.
On the 2nd day of christmas richie gave to me, a domestic at 11:30!
after all the clout is removed everyone will still be in there same spots, only with one less direction to shift the blame.
To all the FTOs that read the blog I am calling on you all to stand with me. When the contract is approved and if we have not been given D2A pay I am asking that all FTO s put in their slips giving up the position.
There has been quite a rough group of newbies that have come out recently and they are more dangerous than I have seen in quite sometime. Of course there are alot of good ones too but for the D2 that we make now its certainly not worth the risk anymore.
If they dont show the FTOs the respect they deserve time to pack it up.
Have a great holiday everyone
Our anonymous CPD "poet laureate" has considerable skills and and a caustic sense of humor.
My runner-up goes to the then Area 6 Homicide team of Jimmy Gilday and Charlie Ford. During the Christmas holidays of 1979 and shortly after Gacy's arrest and the grisly discoveries beneath his house, Gilday also gave his variation of "Twas the Night before Christmas". It was hilarious. The second line read "and all through the CRAWLSPACE..."
However, my personal all-time favorite was penned by the legendary Booker T. Porter of Area 4 Homicide. It was the "EBONICS" translation of the Miranda warnings. I believe it began with "Look here, muthafucka!"
I always cherished the "gallows humor" of veteran homicide dicks. Most outsiders just wouldn't understand. It helped us keep our sanity.
Great poem. Got a good laugh out of that.
What never fails to amaze me is the number of people who join the police department with the intent to "get off the street" as quickly as possible. I have always thought that new officers should be prohibited from transferring out of patrol for a minimum of 5 years. Yes, this also includes working the desk on a permanent basis. You want to be a cop? Plan to stay on the street for 5 years before you find a hiding spot. I think a lot of folks would think twice before applying. Perhaps then, the people who really want to be cops will get a chance to get hired.
I must say that whomever wrote that poem truly has a talent. If not for fear of economic security, some of the most talented people on earth would never have taken this job.
My fellow officers, look at this as a job, NOT A CAREER.
No lieutenants until next week...
losers!
On the second day of Christmas Richie gave to me,
Two percent more taxes and
A boss who used be a G
On the second day of Christmas Richie gave to me...
2 deputies crying,
and a boss who used to be a G...
On the 2nd day of Christmas King Richie gave to me... 30 days pending and a boss who will be reporting directly to the G...
Anonymous said...
No lieutenants until next week...
losers!
12/07/2007 06:11:00 PM
----------------------------
Screw YOU!
I just got made!!
My clout came through!
HOW DID YOU DO LOSER?
Northside said
"My runner-up goes to the then Area 6 Homicide team of Jimmy Gilday and Charlie Ford."
-------------------------------
Area 6?
Get back in the museum Northside.
7:55 PM
In 1979, the second floor of the police station at 2452 W. Belmont Avenue was then known as Area 6.
Area 3 was located at 3900 S. California Avenue.
Was there a point to your post?
no no no... old a/6 damen & irving...
Northside said
"My runner-up goes to the then Area 6 Homicide team of Jimmy Gilday and Charlie Ford."
-------------------------------
> > > Area 6?
Get back in the museum Northside.
-------------------------------
In 1979, the second floor of the police station at 2452 W. Belmont Avenue was then known as Area 6.
Area 3 was located at 3900 S. California Avenue.
Was there a point to your post?
-----------------------------
> > > yeah, it's not 1979 anymore and no one gives 2 shits about
Area 6 or ex-Superintendent
Richard Brezak's bee-hive hairdo.
Northside,
They just made 20 new lieutenant's today.
Are you getting closer to making it?
Song sounds like it should be sung:
by sgt wuh wuh wuh from area one. What do you know it: i'm all of a sudden a poet.
"...it's not 1979 anymore and NO ONE gives 2 shits about Area 6..." - 1:20 AM
Oh. Really? Aside from yourself, who do you speak for? Some of the best stories on SCC and the NYPD Rant are dusty. Do you have a problem with that? If so, please explain in 500 words or less.
11:40 PM
The old Area 6 stood at 3801 N. Damen before the firehouse was built. Right across Grace St. from J&J's saloon (and on to Mike's on Webster).
t'was the night before christmas and all through the house, everybody felt shitty, even the mouse...
1:20 AM
Just speak for yourself, asshole.
In 1979, the second floor of the police station at 2452 W. Belmont Avenue was then known as Area 6.
Area 3 was located at 3900 S. California Avenue.
----------------------------
> > > "it's not 1979 anymore and
no one gives 2 shits about
Area 6 or ex-Superintendent
Richard Brezak's bee-hive hairdo."
-----------------------------
For that matter no one cares that before 1966 they did not have checkerboard hat-bands like the one on Northside's hat (his goofy picture) OR the stripes down the side of the pants.
It's soon to be 2008 and hopefully we can pray the corruption that this Police Department has been fueled by from our corrupt politicians for the last 152 years will come to a halt with this new Superintendent.
- - At the least for the 4 years his contract is in effect.
Sgt. Merit dawns house is beautiful with the decorations for X-mas, but she wont be able to enjoy X-mas because ms. ginger has her working to elect congressman lapinski in the up coming febuary election.
hey dawn how long until you make merit lt, and who is you pck for dc of twenty two.
merry x-mas to you and your patronage friends may 2008 restore accountability and creditbility to this once great dept. destroyed by the nineteenth ward political hacks.
...on the 5th day of christmas king ritchie gave to me, fiive reverends! 4 crack hoes, 3 c/r's, 2 missions aaand mary mitchell in a pear tree!!!!!
"...it's not 1979 anymore and NO ONE gives 2 shits about Area 6..."
-----------------
"Some of the best stories on SCC and the NYPD Rant are dusty.
Do you have a problem with that?"
If so, please explain in 500 words or less
-----------------
Screw police stories..
That's why I never go out drinking with coppers. It's nothing but bullshit pol-ice shit from the past.
I have 25 years on and I don't give a damn about nonsense police crap.
We SHOULD be considered about the contract.. WHAT GOES IN OUR POCKETS.
Also, putting out CURRENT information on the corrupt politicians and bosses in an attempt to make things right as futile as it seems.
If we are lucky we can put some clout assholes/bosses/politicians in the penitentiary from the information that is gained.
By the way..
when I retire in 3 years, 2 months, 4 days and 11 hours I will NEVER talk about pol-ice shit or the old Area 6 or the “old Fil-mo” station . . for I HAVE A LIFE.
It’s the guys who keep talking about “copper crap” that can’t let go of the job years after they retire.
Watch “The New Centurions” as George C. Scott blows his brains out 2 months after he retires because he can’t let go of the s-s-stupid job.
Sad.
12:36 PM
Ain't you a bitch!
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