Way for CPD to Save $$$
We've discovered a way for the Department to save millions of dollars a year. And it'll help cut down on property crimes and increase police coverage in areas of the City that actually pay taxes. It'll save cops money and will work well with an 8, 10 and 12 hour day.
- Telecommuting
That's right. You can police from the comfort of your own home. With a little electronic tweaking, you could monitor pod cameras via your internet connection and still be in your own neighborhood deterring garage burglaries and home invasions. If you care to generate revenue, you can walk the dog and write a few parkers on the next block. If the gypsies show up at your door, you can invite them in and kill them right in your own living room. The shooting scene will be nice and compact, you can use your own bathroom and the pizza guy knows where you live already, so no waiting for the FOP Field Reps to bring anything by. Lord knows you won't get sued.
Anyone else have money saving ideas? Besides not hiring anyone - Richie already is doing that one.
Anyone else have money saving ideas? Besides not hiring anyone - Richie already is doing that one.
Labels: we got nothing
posted by SCC at 12:01 AM
47 Comments:
this is the lead story... where do you come up with this stuff...however scc, i love it
The CPD can be the first fully "Green" Department in the nation. Installing wind turbines at 35th St. on the 5th floor would be the answer to our budgetary problems. The amount of hot air blowing around that floor would generate enough electricity to power all the District Stations. The excess electricity could be sold back to ComEd.
Also in the works should be a "Waste to Energy" program where all the bovine excrement in the building could be shoveled into fermentation vats. The methane could be drawn off and burned in our new hybrid methane/electric vehicles.
There is a system like this already installed at City Hall with the contract being run by none other than a Daley relative. The city states it hasn't been profitable since its installation due to cost over-runs.
Funny.....Very Funny........
Have to clean the keyboard again..
Almost lost some Jameson....
I don't care anymore........
Retired 2003
Let more PO's retire than you hire, cut out OT and court time...oh, they're already doing that.
How about cutting out bodyguard details at least to the Mayor's out of state properties. How much do you think that would save in gas and hotel costs alone? How about cutting out any bodyguards and making them pay for any out of their own salaries? Kind of like the public would have to do.
How about cutting out the budget for office decorating that the aldercreatures get? How about slashing the salaries of aldercreatures to under six figures?
Let me see the useless units in the detective division.
Eliminate the youth and robbery lts. These positions should be handled by the sergeants. Take home cars and never ever called out. Or eliminate one lts. position there is no need for 3 lts. in each area when the districts have no help.
crime analysis unit det division.
How about them their patronage hacks that work making out crime patterns. A whole unit comprised of fifteen people doing the job once performed by one person in each area. 15 more useless merit detective hacks to return to the street. That 3 dicks back to each area.
Next. Bomb and Arson eliminated.
Keep the Bomb techs, the dicks belong back in the areas assigned to field duties when not investigating there misdemeanor cases. Fire dept. should handle scene, then the area dicks can follow up. Dumb all the wieners and do nothings, make them work as dicks or send them back to patrol. Laziest dogs in the division.
One Lt, and five sgts spots for district law enforcement.
Fatal arson fires should be handled by violent crime detectives anyway.
Financial Crimes Unit. What a friggin joke, this unit is made up off patronage hacks. Please explain to me why these dogs need take home cars when gas is 4.35 a gallon. Why are they taking home cars, when are they ever called out. I thought Peterson had at least some sense. Please return our radios to the areas the working detectives need them.
Let the feds or attorney generals office investigate these non violent crimes.
COLD CASE MERIT DETECTIVE UNIT NO BID
Why is each member given a take home car to shop with? Why do they need personal vehicles?
There investigations are years old they could use the CTA..
These people would better serve the areas.
Assign area detectives two men in each area.
The FBI task force. Patronage patronage, patronage. These people belong back in the areas, clout clout clout.
Patrol Administration:
Court section: Should be reserved for light duty police officers not
the clout heavy do nothing police.
Eliminate the sgts. how many are only working four hours a day.
All they do is screw the working police over. Thanks for catching the sos scandal. NOT
traffic safety unit. Leave youre car at the district, and work from home. No one cares about your presentations or how to place a car seat correctly in a vehicle.
These P/os should be working in the districts available to the watch.
Major accidents. Place in the detective areas.
DISTRICT CAPS
Eliminate the Caps Lt. leave one sgt and one p/o. This job function was handled by a sgt and a civilian years ago. You do not need fifteen do nothing p/os mainly females hanging out doing nothing. Return all to field duties.
Commanders administrative assistants. Some districts have ten to fifteen office people. Sorry,
two people on days, and one p/o assigned to each watch as a watch secretary.
Tactical Secretary.Eliminate your a police officer not a seventy thousand dollar a year secretary.
Office of the First Deputy.
124 people mainly females. You have to be kidding us.
Area deputy chiefs. Eliminate and eliminate there do nothing staffs including the detective assigned there and four p/os. Give the authority to Operations Command return these people to district law enforcement or detective division.
Area Gang Teams: Eliminate, designate one tac sergeant from each district as a liaison to detectives. Return the dicks to the areas.
POD Police Cameras.
This function could be handled by civilians not police officers. Plenty of college kids could down load the videos which are useless most of the time. When a camera is installed call for a district car.
A Lt. Sgt. and eight p/os could be returned to district law enforcement.
Medical Section:
Bid the medical out to a hospital organization with deep pockets. All the p/os belong in district law enforcement, the sgts numbers could be cut in half. An outside organization would worry about malpractice suits and treat us correctly.
Patrol does not deserve to be short changed. Eliminate the bike patrol, the foot posts etc until all watches are filled, add an extra wagon to each district.
Dick Mission teams. Assign each area eight p/os like in the past to do pro active police work.
District law enforcement should be the first priority of this department not the last.
SCC; You are too funny, you are the best and missed your calling. Jackie Gleason would of been proud of you.
Very old school det.
CCW.
Now.
Stop paying over three hundred thousand dollars a year to someone without the ability to handle this deparment.
Stop hiring his fed buddies who also don't have a clue about running this department.
I think I just shaved a million bucks off of the budget.
In an effort to solve the battery conundrum, we could buy cases upon cases of dixie cups and connect them with really, really long lines of kite string.
We could down the Department helicopter and replace it with a hot air balloon. The fuel source in this Department would be endless.
7/14/2008 01:21:00 AM
Agree 100% working blue shirt!
Get rid of the district managers and have one aldercreature per district. That will save a lot of money!!!
1. BRING YOUR OWN TOILET PAPER.2. WINDMILLS TO POWER STATIONS 3.STOP USING NATURAL GAS (DURING WINTER) TO HEAT STATIONS, LET P.O.'S DRINK WHISKEY INSTEAD 4.STOP PAYING THE B.S LAWSUITS, I HAVEN'T SEEN 1 PERSON YET THAT WAS ACTUALLY WRONGED AND AWARDED ANY MONIES
I like the "telecommuting" idea!
Can I do it from my summer home in Michigan, Mayor Daley!
District law enforcement should be the first priority of this department not the last.
7/14/2008 01:21:00 AM
My money says you will retire, if you make that far, as the bottom feeder that you apear to be.
Eliminate this...eliminate that,
how bout eliminating cry babies and snitches?
. . . Court section: Should be reserved for light duty police officers not
the clout heavy do nothing police. . .
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
Used to be that you could only get into the Ct. Section if you were light duty. They would not take full duty PO's.
Conceal/carry, so that the actual GOOD citizens can take out the trash every so often.
BONUS: NO TRR!
Foot patrols save on gas.
Pass concealed carry and repeal the city gun ban.Less officers will be needed.
35th & Mich
CAPS
TRU
CCG
Deputy of Caps
Take home cars
feild lt's
park cars handling maybe 2-3 jobs a tour. Normally worked by dogs anyways
Overstaffed Commanders office and CAPS office also.
Sat teams
And did i mention caps people?
how about if you get rid that old ass civilian chief pilot who is aboy 70 years old
You may be jesting but its already being done.
3 reasons for property crime in Chicago. These are probably all overseen by the mob/Daley, police dept has zip manpower assigned.
1. Pawn shops
2. Flea markets
3. Scrap yards.
Hey, a large portion of the private sector works from home so why not? I've already constructed a lock-up in my basement. Plus you could deputize your kids and get them on the payroll.
Exempts can work as prostitutes on the side sucking di%k.
Oh wait . .
How about getting rid of some aldercreatures? I know it's not the CPD's realm, but it would save money nontheless!
No August academy class. Are they ever going to hire more officers?
This is your best post yet!!!!!!!!!! LOL for 10 minutes
My money says you will retire, if you make that far, as the bottom feeder that you apear to be.
Eliminate this...eliminate that,
how bout eliminating cry babies and snitches?
7/14/2008 08:22:00 AM
Ok boss nice gold star your manhood is gone right! Now blow me like you did to get the badge from your alderidiot!
1) Taste of Chicago $8.00 entrance fee.
2) Commission for 10 min of time due per $100 of citations
3) Casino in 18th Dist
4) Auction the bean
5) Put fake flowers in the flower pots (nobody will care)
Total of 1.5 billion the first year
Tried many many years ago to out source the medical section with a hospital....way more money than thought.....cheaper to keep po
I KNOW HOW TO SAVE MONEY..GET RID OF AT LEAST 25 ALDERMEN!
One way to save some money is to take the take home cars away from the admin people that work in Personnel, why do they even need cars? Some P.O.'s even use them for their part time jobs on Fridays (M.S.). The Lt had her car taken away months ago, but the useless still get pampered. Can we all use the gas pumps the city provides??????
Gt rid of half of the exempts, we don't need them. Get rid of the district managers-- a clouted, political spot for a citizen who knows nothing about running a police station.
Yeah! Lets get rid of the ridiculous number of Mayor Bodyguards (26) This doesnt include the Police Lobby detail, or his Office Police Detail... and how about Burke's Body Guards!!!! Does he really need 6 ???? Or the goofy city counsel chamber police detai. Hell, just borrow Burkes 6 Body Guards when he's at the hall since they all work days. Oh! But there's no overtime for them to scam out of it, so guess not.
I retired last year and am looking some part time work.
Sign me up.
"My money says you will retire, if you make that far, as the bottom feeder that you apear to be.
Eliminate this...eliminate that,
how bout eliminating cry babies and snitches?
7/14/2008 08:22:00 AM"
So, put your money where your mouth is.
In your case, that would mean somebody's ass would be jammed up with your money.
Thats silly, just plain silly, silly, silly,silly!!!
Screen 911 calls.Anything classified as baby mama drama no beat car to respond.
how about trying to repair broken down car instead of buying new ones? how about cutting back on mechanics to fix these cars? how about saving gas by having 4 rows of brokendown cars at belmont and western? how about we just use flintstone cars and use our feet? how about saving some money on radio repairs? we can bring back the old police call boxes!
chief pilot what a piece of shit
Commander Hohm
Pay me $300k to be Super and save the city $10k!!
Eliminate this...eliminate that,
how bout eliminating cry babies and snitches?
7/14/2008 08:22:00 AM
You mean all the rank and specialty position folks??
Actually follow and enforce CPD hiring practices,like REAL background checks,POWER test,drug tests,medical exam,no gang affiliation,no political hires.
You know,hire qualified folks.
Why do they need to save any more money? They are already saving tens of millions by short-staffing every rank under Commander. Yes, literally tens of millions of dollars stolen and its diverted to???? Not the pension thats for sure!
Save money, let Sgts run the caps offices. 25 Lt's salary a yr.
save $$$$$ hire civilians (retired police officers) to take police reports and write parking tickets for $20.00 an hour
And did i mention caps people?
7/14/2008 09:38:00 AM
No, don't think you did.
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