Not Only a Mattress
Someone commented about the gun located under a lockup mattress:
- A mattress? Since when do they get mattresses?
Since a few years ago, when some judge decided that the cold hard metal cots in lockup were too hard on prisoners' delicate heinies and sciatica. So the city was required to buy mattresses made of a non cut-able Tyvek material which are issued nightly to anyone staying overnight for a morning court appearance. Every lockup in the city now has two stacks of mattresses - one for issuance to prisoners and one that somehow didn't live up to the billing of non cut-able.
But it's gone a step further now:
But it's gone a step further now:
- Hey SCC, the other day the District had to down a car to go down to HQ to pick up new one-time use lockup blankets, probably courtesy of the Vanecko Disposable Blanket Company. Word is that shortly there will be a Prisoner Massage Pilot Program starting in 003, 005 and 007.
Disposable blankets?
Labels: un-fucking-believable
posted by SCC at 12:04 AM
45 Comments:
Enough already.
Thank the Dart Doofus.
It's a safety issue, slippery floors are unsafe.
Read all federal lawsuits against municipalities.. yes, per case law we need to provide food, drink, adequate clothing, mattresses and blankets. If you wanna be a tough guy and say it’s BS then research it. And if your feeling especially tough then deny a prisoner any of the above stuff. If you don’t care about your bank account then deny them all of it or any of it. Otherwise who cares????? Give it to them and you will be in tact and unedfected.
The massage program is all part of a pilot program to put all the Ho's that aint in jail to work courtesy of the talent agency of Fux & Prickwrinkle. LMAO
i thought the prisoner massage program started in 006 a few months ago
This is 100 percent true. They are yellow one time use blankets that HQ only dispenses 5 at a time to a district.RUMOR HAS IT, HEATED FOOD AND JUICES ARE NEXT.
Nothing new, SCC. In the burbs, we have had washable foam mattresses and blankies for prisoners for quite a number of years now.
Aye carumba! Next they will be given a sleep mask, noise cancelling headphones, a teddy bear, a pillow embroidered with "Compliments of Barb West", a softly whispered wake-up call and a hot cup of coffee! When they start getting court-ordered massages and access to a hot tub, I'm going to surrender at the nearest CPD facility with a lock-up.
And "Personal Massages" are given in 006. Lol
Ask the courts, nothing is too good for our prisoners and criminals.
WTF?
What next?
Policemen have to cuddle up
with these throw-away m/fers?
Hol' dey han'?
Rub
dey foots?
Kiss in dey ass?
"Why do you Cops want so much to retire,
leave a beautiful city like Chicago and take all your treasure
and get off to a cabin on a hill in the woods?"
Because the fact that Chicago is a devolving
shit-show makes a cabin in the woods on a hill
very desirable?
Whatever...
Liberalism is a toxic mold that
is rotting the flesh from society's bones...
Society willingly reclines while
grinning in riotous, multi-colored rot.
That's what simultaneously drives us
native son Policemen mad with grief
and anger.
Do they get a pillow and a blankie?
Why bother. Just answer your calls.
You can tell it,s getting close to the elections, gotta make everybody happy. At Guantanmo they painted the floors with arrows pointing to Meca so the prisoners know which way to face when praying. Would be a nice touch here!
Considering that slobs that come in and out of lockup, the chances of catching something are great. And given the propensity of the Shitty to settle whenever the Ghetto Lottery Lever is pulled, it's not going to be too long before one of the aspiring brain surgeons that was jus' turnin' his life around when he was exposed to the scabie liceification contained in the nasty blanket that wasn't washed properly, and that's one tick on the list of shit they don't have to deal with if they just throw the damn things out....
Add in haz-mat handling needed for the lockup personnel when dealing with that crap... The special washing/hazmat for the cleaners/laundry... the cost to transport all that stuff to/from...
And there's some more ticks.
I'd give the fuckers some space blankets because they're cheap, but knowing the innovative shits, they'd probably figure out a way to burn the jail down...
Hey SCC, the other day the District had to down a car to go down to HQ to pick up new one-time use lockup blankets, probably courtesy of the Vanecko Disposable Blanket Company. Word is that shortly there will be a Prisoner Massage Pilot Program starting in 003, 005 and 007.
Disposable blankets?
What next pjs, booties and a night cap...wtf
Nat Geo had the documentary about the Russian prisons on again the other night. Now, they really know how to run a prison! A no-nonsense approach to penology if I ever saw one. The high security prisons keep 'em locked up all day and night and when out of their cells on the way to interrogations, etc. they are escorted by no less than three armed guards, cuffed, and bent over at the waist as to not see the layout of the building and hallways. Cells are behind two sets of bars, and one steel door. Nice.
The lower security prisons are all in the Siberian boonies, and run with military like efficiency (calisthenics at 0600) and no lip from prisoners. We should either hire some of their penology experts to work here. Oh, and no pizza.
Each prisoner will be issued Mr. Bear, he’s lovable and huggable and available for purcase in the CPD gift shop as you exit the park.
Oh hell in a certain NW suburban department we used to have wool blankets for the prisoners and we would provide McDonalds in the evening and in the morning before court.
Imagine the bug infestations in those mattresses and blankets.
Mint on the illow?
The blankets are courtesy of CALEA...pillows are next to be mandated by these clowns
Anonymous said...
This is 100 percent true. They are yellow one time use blankets that HQ only dispenses 5 at a time to a district.RUMOR HAS IT, HEATED FOOD AND JUICES ARE NEXT.
6/20/2018 12:27:00 AM
You can't blame the department for this. There are commissions and associations that are driving these comfort items being placed in local jails. Some of the suburbs have been doing this for some time as well as other cities. I think Chicago has resisted for years on these " reforms". Yes, there is a good chance that a hot meal, along with a toothbrush and a chance to wash up will be next. I recall the days when it was a baloney on white bread, no condiments, no coffee or water to drink. No blankets, no mattress. The lockeup keepers could play cards all night with the watch commander ( who was a hell of a guy)
"Hey office, how about hooking me up with more sandwiches?"
Nice lets make the scum comfortable,how about meeting with thugs and their families that tries to maim/kill police officers maybe bring them to say city hall and meet in rahms office with rahm! Err silly me rahm already does exactly this!
For all coppers think about this from the McDonald,to Lequier debacle, if eddie and the rest of the silly exempt rank apparatus would of stuck with following the law, and following general orders knowing the coppers were right and did their jobs we would of saved face,and saved millions in rahm piggy bank payouts! Please think before acting in Chicago's jungles, the civil suits will directly affect the coppers bank accounts, many coppers have paid out from their personal bank accounts it is just not worth it!
Boss: Go get them kid I will give you an "early duck"
Copper: No thanks boss not worth it then smile!
When you have to start handing out the sleep-select custom 'My Pillows' you'll know it's all over but the shouting.
What about the detainees who would like to get to know their cell mate better. Condoms and gel. Consensual of course.
What about the detainees who would like to get to know their cell mate better. Condoms and gel. Consensual of course.
When does Sleep number take over from Vanecko Sleep Solutions ?
When does Sleep Number take over from Vanecko Sleep Solutions ?
So whose job is it to put the mint on the pillow?.
True, washable blankets and mattresses have been around for years. I'm not sure what an actual washed blanket or mattress looks like though.
I thought the prisoner massage program started in 6 on days at St Bernard’s
Carlyle will be rehired to conduct foot massages.
Warm milk and graham crackers
Disposable blankets? Why not just call them diapers?
We need Public and Lockup Lactation Stations because y’all can be separating our famblies.
An gimme my prayer mat and halal kosherized sammich too.
Since we’re on an arrestee amenities kick...
Ones appearance in bond court goes a long way.
Does the lockup barber still do a shave and a haircut for two bits?
Softball goofs of Cook County Chicago - The Nations Shithole.
Stay Fetal - Keep the lockup empty.
Will the scholars have a say on the firmness?
what, no 'my pillow'?
not autographed by tinny, kimmy, tommy and auntie toni?
door prizes for being good criminals?
i am appalled.
The mattress are used as sleeping bags because they slit the ends and sleep under the top cover. If you give them blankets then you give them a noose to hang themselves. Glad no lock up in my district.
Illinois municipal jail and lockup standards requires that and much much more!!! Look it up
Anonymous Anonymous said...
So whose job is it to put the mint on the pillow?.
6/20/2018 09:37:00 AM
That’s the Detention Aide’s responsibility.
If a government entity locks someone up, that entity is responsible for taking care of them properly. There are standards the state has set for such things. if you don't use disposable stuff you have to send it out for laundering.
Perhaps the real answer is to move detainees out so they don't have to spend the night. Would require some coordination with county, but it might be worth doing just to simplify things.
Do they offer turn-down service for their beds and a mint on their pillows?
If you are in jail, it doesn't matter if you sleep on the best mattress available, you are still lock up.
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