Groot's Snitch Line (UPDATE)

Remember when CPD was going to implement "snitich boxes" so concerned citizens could submit anonymous tips about crimes and murders via a paper note into a mailbox like device? We believe it was during McCompStat's tenure and the Department went so far as to buy some reinforced mailboxes, but never actually deployed them. We had a bet at the time that at least one would be stuffed full of excrement and another with lighter fluid and burned. We have since joked that they may have been repurposed as Weed Amnesty Boxes at the airports.

Groot has proposed modernizing the East German Ministerium für Staatsicherheit practice of recruiting something like 10% of the compliant busybodies to become informants for the new police state:

• Tips submitted through this service are encrypted, confidential and are immediately available to the public safety organization. In certain cases, depending on the organization, you may be eligible for a cash reward. After submitting your tip, you will be provided with a unique tip code that you can use to see updates on your tip and chat in real-time. 

De Blasio tried this in New York recently:

• Mayor de Blasio’s social distancing snitching program is sending cops out on thousands of dead-end calls.
  
  Most of the 17,745 reports made to the city’s 311 complaint repository as of April 24 about people within six feet of each other were fruitless pursuits for the NYPD, according to department data.
  
  The alleged offenders were usually gone, and police found no evidence of social distancing violations or opted not to take action on 9,378 of the calls, or 53 percent of the time.

Sounds like a great use of police resources as the summer killing season is upon us. Luckily, pranksters shut down the system in short order:

• Mayor Bill de Blasio was forced to temporarily close his coronavirus 'snitch hotline' over the weekend as the service was inundated with prank calls, pictures of genitalia and memes likening de Blasio to Adolf Hitler.
  
  De Blasio unveiled the controversial scheme on Saturday, urging New Yorkers to text 311 to report anyone violating the state's social distancing rules or stay-at-home orders. However, the response didn't quite go to plan as aggrieved members of the public vehemently criticized the 'tyrannical overreach' the hotline posed and within hours it was flooded messages of contempt for de Blasio instead.
  
  Such messages included photos of extended middle fingers and links to articles about de Blasio breaking his own social distancing instructions when he was seen going into a gym in mid-March, after the coronavirus outbreak had already started ravaging the city.

It sure would be a shame if Groot's efforts at a Police State were similarly thwarted.

UPDATE: Snitches revealed in the Show-Me State:

• Hundreds of people have been exposed for reporting people who have flouted social distancing rules and some are now scared they could receive a backlash.
  
  The names and addresses of approximately 900 people in Missouri were released as part of a media request under the Sunshine Law, which allows for the release of information submitted to a public agency (except for wrongdoing and abuse tips).
  
  St. Louis County had urged the community to share details of anyone not following guidelines in response to the coronavirus pandemic and noted in the terms and conditions that information may be shared publicly.
  
  However some people may not have read the small print submitted tips via an online form and email from the end of March.

Did anyone NOT see this coming a mile away?