Our Favorite Time of Year
Regardless of snowfall or lack thereof, one-hundred-seven miles of Streets will be off limits for overnight parking until April:
Chicago’s winter overnight parking ban will go into effect Friday morning, meaning cars parked on bus routes and main roads will be towed regardless of snow.
The citywide ban affects 107 miles of streets and will be in effect nightly from 3 a.m. to 7 a.m. until April 1. Drivers can visit chicagoshovels.org to check which routes are affected.
Streets and Sanitation Commissioner Cole Stallard said the ban is a safety issue. He said it keeps routes clear for emergency vehicles, public transportation and snowplows, which are unable to fully plow and salt roads when cars are left parked.
We haven't really kept track, but hundreds of miles of streets have been rendered un-parkable for bike lanes that aren't plowed all winter. Also, what used to be two lanes in each direction are now one. It's made parts of the city undrivable and other parts very truck unfriendly, hindering economic development.
But the part that makes it our favorite is the betting - the over/under on how many vehicles get towed on the first night. We're a little out of practice, so this will probably be off a bit:
- we'll set the over/under at 135 vehicles
Place your bets.
Labels: sarcasm AND silliness
posted by SCC at 12:05 AM
36 Comments:
101
Clark St from Devon to Edgewater has been destroyed with the bike lanes, narrowing what at one time was three lanes in each direction to now just one lane in each direction. Traffic is now a nightmare there! No one uses the bike lanes & when I used to ride a bike before I got old, I always used the parallel side streets, far safer!
Bike lanes are easily fixed in the winter... Just keep shearing those damned pylons off with the plows....
Blizzard conditions boss! Sorry, hard to see. That "ping, ping, ping, ping, ping, ping..." sound I figured was the ice balls hittin' the cab... 12 hr shift ya know.
Oh well, it'll get fixed in the spring....
Just a money grab!
Over. About 163. 47 of them will not be towed as they are in "Sensitive Areas."
Doesn't Cold Weather also slow down the body count?
The traditional seasonal city hustle fucking.
Backed by that slim thread of validity to valid purpose,
The hogs need to feed.
More people trying to warm up their car mean more opportunities for the Kia Boys to pull up and rob them.
215
Bike lanes! Reason #12 I got the fuck out of Chicago (and Illinois for that matter).
You can make so many PSA and repeatedly stress this overnight ban, but you can bet that the community will scream that the streets in black and brown communities were ‘targeted’ in this overnight swept. If anything, the city will target the weary ‘taxpayer’ because they know that they’ll pay the fines to get their car returned.
That's racists.
one thing for sure, Chicago is not short on stupid people
Liberals getting their vehicles towed is nice way to start the day.
Too, and remember this...there must be "equity" in giving out tickets, per the wonderful mayor!
The bike lanes have to go in 24 on Clark street. Can’t get to jobs With or without lights and sirens. Going to get someone killed with crap response times. Ambos can barely get to jobs. Worst idea ever installing bike lanes and narrow streets at the same time. Tear them all out.
Quite interesting that you can commit multiple felonies here and get out of jail with no cash bail but ordinary citizens who get their cars towed have to pay bail for the car or it sits in car jail forever. I got it at 205.
More vehicles that get impounded less pickings for the mutts
275 vehicles hooked!
It would be fun to see what area had the "Most" vehicles towed.
Bike lanes. These leftist politicians will turn us into China whether we like it or not, even if it kills us all……Maybe that is their plan…..
Depending on how many tow trucks are out there my guess is 157. You will post that final snowless total right SCC??
Well this bike lane nonsense has spread to the Detroit area too. When I visit I'm amazed how previously smooth quick commutes have become a single lane snails pace.
Remember the promise that the city will shovel the sidewalks.
They've destroyed Milwaukee Avenue with their bike lanes.
And, to be clear, this towing is and has always been a scam. While you can laugh at it, laugh at yourself for all the payouts you make as a sucker in the City of Chicago.
I'll take over 135
with all these bike lanes the mayor will declare that since not enough people of color use them the city will now have a bike give-away in the ghetto, they get free taxpayer supplied bikes.
163.7 objects once resembling motors vehicles towed.
Operating and/or riding a bike adjacent to moving motor vehicles is a death wish.
Survey says 143.
141
B J BS follow the Brighton park neighbors on Facebook where 2 unk ‘helpful’ gentleman were undercover offering Attorneys for the groups wanting to kick out the illegals. They were really trying to divide Asian and Hispanic organized protests over the illegals This BJ is very under handed think these under covers were copa people again . More reasons to have citywide news people look at this Shitcanery.
Any PO who enforces this and writes tows is a spineless jagoff. Fuck this city. Fuck generating revenue so some greedy government official can embezzle it. Grow a set and stop writing for this shithole city.
265. There are Russians who have taken a car wash on the 3300 block of Milwaukee. They use it as as dumping grounds for auctioned cars. Parked up and down Milwaukee. They will lose at least three dozen.
$100 sez Over at 157. Donate my winnings to the charity of your choice.
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