Wienermobile Wrecks
CPD names Keesing Bandit as the primary suspect:
- An Oscar Mayer Wienermobile got into a pickle on a Chicago highway.
The hot-dog shaped Wienermobile hit a car Monday morning along Interstate 294 and its driver lost control and overcorrected, causing it to roll onto its side near the Chicago suburb of Oak Brook, Illinois State Police said.
No injuries were reported after the crash, which prompted the closure of the right lane of northbound I-294 for more than an hour, officials said.
A spokesperson for the Oscar Mayer brand, which has several Wienermobiles, told the Chicago Sun-Times it’s “grateful that everybody involved is safe and there were no injuries.”
A possibly made-up APB was distributed by Larritorious:
- An unknown, possibly male identifying subject, dressed in a shockingly purple spangly jumpsuit and black suede knee-high boots, topped with a feather boa and pirate hat tilted at a very rakish angle, carrying an armful of Oscar Mayer wieners was seen fleeing the scene. A nearby thermos that was dropped by the fleeing individual contained what appeared to be a very tasty concoction of white wine and seltzer water. Consider the subject to be armed and fabulous.
Approach with caution.
Labels: sarcasm AND silliness
posted by SCC at 12:05 AM
36 Comments:
Under the influence of those famous white wine spritzers?
I always pay an extra buck or 2 for Vienna Beef. Now I know why.
Mustard and ketchup everywhere!
Alright.
That does it.
YOU are the Keesing Bandit!!!!
Was the driver ejaculated from the Wienermobile?
Hahahaha! There's a bandit on the loose!
No doubt the driver was also drunk on cock.
This caper and wiener has the Bandit’s fingerprints all over it.
A spokesperson for the Oscar Mayer brand, which has several Wienermobiles, told the Chicago Sun-Times it’s “grateful that everybody involved is safe and there were no injuries.”
Rumor has it the driver was hot dogging it and lost his mustard, relish the idea...
Was the wienermobile on his way to meet Kamala?
Are you telling me that Kackles Harris’ new bus, which was to be unveiled at the DNC, is wrecked?
It is very difficult to keep the Keesing Bandit under control nowadays.
Was Willie Brown driving?
Was Heels Up Harris in the passenger seat performing gymnastic type contortions?
The driver reported he hit a patch of ketchup spilled on the roadway. This is why you never put ketchup on a hot dog.
Sounds like the weiner went limp.
I heard he was really hot doggin it on the highway….Ba Dum Tsssss
Is this a DEI thing?
I heard Brandon Johnson was driving with Larry seating shotgun……
PPO here. I’m confused about cleaning my gun. Do I put it on the top or bottom rack of the dishwasher to clean it?? Normal wash cycle or delicate cycle?? I appreciate the help and any advice! Happy to be here!
Are you frelling kidding???
The current Wienermobile is a modified MINI Cooper?
They used to be built on a motorhome chassis.
I guess shrinkflation affects everything.
Think of the size of THAT prophylactic!!!
that's why you don't need a college degree to drive wiener mobile?
who is the border czar?? camela is very busy campaigning on taxpayers$$$$$$$$$$$$
joe should be removed 25th amendment
As a former employee of the Scott street plant. I wanted to pack as many fine lads I could fit in it for a night out. Parking in front of the Bijou theatre I was told would be in bad taste.
I just don't understand
I would not be approaching with caution, I would be staying far away
Anonymous Anonymous said...
PPO here. I’m confused about cleaning my gun. Do I put it on the top or bottom rack of the dishwasher to clean it?? Normal wash cycle or delicate cycle?? I appreciate the help and any advice! Happy to be here!
7/24/2024 01:07:00 PM
No need to put it in the dishwasher, just polish it the same way you polish your “tack tickle” boots.
They don't bring he Weinermobile into Wyoming anymore. It is not safe to drive in Wyoming's high winds. Going North on I25 from Cheyenne wind regularly tops 60 mph. The Weinermobile has been swatted off the road more than once.
Keesing Bandit, defend your honor. You'd never settle for such low-quality meat.
Note to accident investigatours: look for high heel prints in the headliner.
"PPO here. I’m confused about cleaning my gun. Do I put it on the top or bottom rack of the dishwasher to clean it?? Normal wash cycle or delicate cycle?? I appreciate the help and any advice! Happy to be here!"
Slide goes in the top rack, frame goes in the bottom rack.....wow, what are they training the kids in the Academy these days.
I wonder how many illegals were stuff in it... and if they fled after the crash
You want a good clean gun spray it down with WD-40 and then wipe it dry with your panties.
No REAL meat in this story!
"Wiener Down!"
Glad the driver's okay. I mean, that's got to really suck. One minute you're driving your Wiener, the next you know you're on your side covered in condiments and shame.
Glad the driver's okay. I mean, that's got to really suck. One minute you're driving your Wiener, the next you know you're on your side covered in condiments and shame.
7/25/2024 12:53:00 PM
With a grin on your face, beaming like the dawning sun.
Sorry I took so long. It was one helluva walk home.
Now, kees me you fool!!!!
I was going to say, keesing bandit for V.P. & No acceptance speech or any other response from Da man? Anyway, it took an overturned wiener to drag the Bandit to speak!!! I thought the Secret Service screwed up again. Glad you’re good K.B.
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