Monday, September 02, 2013

Naked Man Tased

  • A naked man was Tasered by police Friday night after he jumped on and shattered the window of a Mercedes on the Near West, Chicago Police said.

    Officers were summoned to the 1400 block of West Randolph shortly about 8 p.m., after people called 911 to complain about a naked man jumping on cars, police said.

    They found the 22-year-old still naked, sitting in a puddle of water, police said. The owner of a nearby 2008 Mercedes said the man had shattered the front windshield of the vehicle.

    The man allegedly became combative with police trying to arrest him, and officers Tasered him, police said.

    He was taken to Mount Sinai Hospital for treatment, police said. No one else was hurt.

    The man may have been under the influence of narcotics, police said.

Gee, ya think?

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19 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Obviously they must have took blood and urine samples to figure out what to do to neutralize it. judging by the behaviour I would venture to guess some form of a
hallucinogenic substance..

9/02/2013 12:11:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He OD'd on Tiny Dancers Kool Aid

9/02/2013 05:56:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

*** 'The man may have been under the influence of narcotics', police said. ***

I'm gonna take a WAG that that was a sarcastic comment, made for the benefit of the ijit Scum-Times 'reporter'. (that's my story and I'm stickin' to it)

Anywho, If this guy did this to me when I had my Benz, he'd have met another 'German' too -- Mr
Gerber.

rule #1: never leave home without a knife
rule #2: see rule #1

9/02/2013 06:19:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some of the classic warning signs of excited delerium it sounds like. They likely saved his life by getting him to the ER.

9/02/2013 06:56:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Go watch the video on the tribune website. The guy whose Mercedes got hit by this guy's ass says "like Lawrence Taylor said, don't smoke crack" Priceless!!!

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/breaking/chi-north-coast-music-fest-tazer-naked-man-20130831,0,2920025.story

9/02/2013 07:37:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why were the responding officers heard saying "Calm down now Mr Superintendent"

9/02/2013 07:44:00 AM  
Anonymous Another Country Heard From said...

Anonymous said...
Obviously they must have took blood and urine samples to figure out what to do to neutralize it. judging by the behaviour I would venture to guess some form of a
hallucinogenic substance..

9/02/2013 12

Obviously you're a master of the obvious. Judging by your submission I would venture to say you're a know-it-all. Thanks for your two cents, Quincy.

And "behavior" with a "U" in it, to boot. I won't even get started on that.

9/02/2013 07:52:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

after tazing it will take weeks for them to drop...

9/02/2013 08:06:00 AM  
Blogger The Keesing Bandit said...

Oh my. Another missed opportunity. I never seem to catch a break.

9/02/2013 08:50:00 AM  
Blogger The Keesing Bandit said...

Now, Kees me you fool!!!!

9/02/2013 08:51:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ED is more that Erectile Dysfunction. When a subject takes off their clothes they are attempting to reduce their body heat, especially if they run and attempt to find water to jump into. This Moron probably had Excited Delirium which is caused by an overdose of cocaine. The brain actually heats up and the subject realizes that he is cooking from the inside out. Often fatal, I was sued on the job for someone dying while we attempted to arrest him. The Med. Examiner ruled final cause of death ED. Be careful they never go after the dealer, they will go after YOU.

9/02/2013 09:03:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Announcement from the stage:
"Do not take the blue Hopeium! Avoid the blue Hopeium! It is too concentrated here in Chicago! You may OD . . . .

Out of town fool don't listen:
Weeeeeeeee! Look at me, I'm dancing in the rain!

I can fly! Owww, did Rham just whack me in the ass?

Whoa, don't ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-taaaaaazzzzeeee me Bro!

Fool Leaves Chicago dazed and cattle prodded, with a bloody ass. But the smartest thing he did all weekend is LEAVE CHICAGO.

9/02/2013 10:30:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

New York City gets the Naked Cowboy and this is what we get.

They can have him and McFuckup and I'll throw Rahm to boot.

9/02/2013 10:44:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

shrinkage

9/02/2013 11:06:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

as captain kirk you say mr sulu fire fasers

9/02/2013 11:45:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Leaf.... See it daily in the ghetto.

9/02/2013 12:11:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

judging by the behaviour I would venture to guess some form of a hallucinogenic substance..

9/02/2013 12:11:00 AM

Nope, poor guy just opened his latest water bill!

9/02/2013 01:48:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This poor person needs understanding, counseling and rehab, not jail.

9/02/2013 03:03:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

judging by the behaviour I would venture to guess some form of a hallucinogenic substance..

9/02/2013 12:11:00 AM

Nope, poor guy just opened his latest water bill!

9/02/2013 01:48:00 PM

I miss being the PO-lices' cause of guys like you 12:11. That's a coppers cop chip in there. In my day the radio was better than cable TV on jobs like this one.

9/02/2013 08:41:00 PM  

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